We too are "your age" and have been to Paris and north/south France five times. Our service people on all levels were fine; they do not engage in casual chit-chat to befriend you which is appropriate and somewhat desireable; different hotels each time. We once had a rude couple next to us in a restaurant where their table was 3" from our table, he smoked and made a comment in French about Americans (I understand a bit of the language), BUT we have also dined numerous times here in the States and in many other countries in Europe where the situation was the same with obnoxious people. Sorry, but most people know not to keep their iPhones in their pockets, they're being stolen here in States as well for instant cash value, and wallets in front pockets while going through turnstiles or strap-hanging is just not being vigilant. I live in NYC, the safest city in the world I'd agree, but you've got to choose smarter options than travelling that way. Speak quietly as to be heard only by the person with whom you're conversing, 'blend in' and pick better travel clothing w/ more secure pockets or use the moneybelt you have! One trip our college-aged daughter's tote was wide open and a pickpocket moved to it again at a Metro turnstile, but I was through and turned and foiled it. (Ever the Moms are we). Lived in Houston four years and hopefully the crime rate can some day improve to the level of where we live, sorry, but facts are facts. Perhaps a group tour might better serve your interests, hopefully you will continue travelling, and lastly, sorry about your experience. Meanwhile, look at travel clothing, it doesnt have to be expensive and the zippered pockets low on leg are great. I travel w/ a PacSafe purse w/ latched zipper and only keep junk in my larger day tote.

Pvoyageuse,

Yes, they can jump the queue and as I said, I am 100% fine with it. Was taken aback at the time because the woman was managing a huge load and pushed in without a single "excuse me or thank you." It was shortly after we moved here.

At 63 and with a bad knee i do not hesitate to give up my seat on the bus or Metro to a pregnant woman. Sometimes my offer is declined but is usually met with a smile and thank you.

My IKEA incident was, I hope, a one-off and as someone said, there are rude and clueless people every where.

Cathinjoetown: I was replying to MaisonPlague :-)

I have never heard of a pregnant woman being allowed or expected to "jumping a queue" and I am not sure why they would. Does this mean everywhere? Movies, restaurants,lines at the grocery store, buying tickets to anything and everything? Why in the world would that be the case?

I am not talking about "metro" but queues.

Well, vjplovesitaly, it's pretty much a given in France which I learned after my IKEA shove.

In this case, not when in Rome but "when in France...."

haha. I will defer to all pregnant women if I ever get to France. Getting pregnant take a special skill which should be deferred to at all times. I think I will bow in their presence.

Hurdle, that razor blade rigging sounds hilarious!

My maid's son goes to Temple University in Philadelphia and he has done the same with his car stereo. Lots of blood all over the car seats, but he still has that stereo!

I will shoot anyone who tries to harm me or my family.

I believe in Darwinism.

Thin

Pvoyageuse, we are always being told nowadays that being pregnant is not an illness! I guess next time I go to France I'll take a cushion with me .... no more having to wait in line eh?

MaisonPlague : you asked a question, I replied. I am not here to discuss whether being pregnant is an illness or not and I wish you good luck with your cushion.

In defense of the OP, I have been on the Champs when the crowd was so thick that one could barely walk. That said, I haven't gone back there in a long time, but it obviously can happen.

In my very middle sized US city, there really is only one neighborhood that attracts tourists. I am in that area often, and I can barely control my impatience with those that are strolling, gawking, gabbing, blocking the sidewalk, etc. A friend of mine used to always be grumbling about the ____ ____ tourists whenever we were in that neighborhood together. He died, but I'm still grumpy when the tourists get in my way.

I can't imagine living in a place where that would be the situation all day, every single day.

Lining up is a very American and Canadian thing. We are so damn polite about it. I had a visitor from Israel, and she was incredulous at the line at the Dairy Queen, where every family and person quietly stood there for half an hour, waiting their turn. She talked about it all night.

Aren't there special seats in the metro cars for (and I may not remember all the conditions) elderly, pregnant, and people with young children? And does it mention Legion of Honor holders?

Yes, and it's les mutilés de la guerre.

Israelis DO NOT queue!

My friend Eynat from Tel Aviv has to remind her family members to line up when they come to visit her here!

Her father once forgot and had a guy smack him in the back of the head.

Thin

Flaubert was Legion of Honor and he hated trains.

He thought trains were ruination of France.

Thin

"Southern Europeans maybe (in fact you can just about identify the country by how much they break the queue), but Northern Europeans never, try that in the UK and "if looks would kill".

In my experience not all of Northern Europe but just the UK.

I remember when I missed a bus in the UK on a Sunday and had to wait at a completely empty bus station for the next one. It was at least 15 minutes before departure when the next guy arrived and took a position at the head of a potential queue, never moving away from that spot for the next quarter of an hour.

A few minutes later the next guy arrived and moved next to the first one. At the end there were maybe 12 people queuing next to each other. I watched them and silently laughed my head off that they would bunch up like that. There was nobody around, just this dozen guys patiently forming a queue in a big, open space.

Then the completely empty bus arrived and even though I had watched them queuing, I automatically moved in the direction of the door and nearly tried to cut in in front of them before I realized what I was doing.

This moving to the door wasn't meant to be impolite. It was just by instinct since I couldn't care less whether I was number one, five or ten to enter the bus and so I had to remember that these guys cared a lot that the number five at the bus station would also be the number five to enter the bus. They cared so much that they'd spend fifteen minutes crowded to each other just to establish the precedence.

I think the cultural difference is that the majority of people in a lot of other countries normally just doesn't care that much whether they're number five, six or seven.

"haha. I will defer to all pregnant women if I ever get to France. Getting pregnant take a special skill which should be deferred to at all times. I think I will bow in their presence."

No, getting pregnant or breaking a leg isn't a special skill.

It's just somewhat more difficult to stand for a long time, so many people think that it makes sense that they stand one minute longer to allow pregnant women to take precedence.

On our first trip more than 40 years ago, we were taking a train from Luxembourg to Paris and the cars were quite crowded. A women in her haughtiest French said, "It must be there first time in France," speaking of my wife and myself. I wanted to say, "Deuxième," but I really can't speak French and was afraid someone would engage me.

Later that week when an elderly Frenchman saw us admiring the iron work on the doors of Notre Dame, he invited us for coffeee. He was of the generation who was grateful to Americans for the liberation of France. When we said that clearly we had nothing to do with it, he said "Of course, but we still wanted to show his appreciation and tell other Americans that the French still remember."

Our next trip a few years later, the Parisians were absolutely rude. Our next trip was after the Olympics at Albertville and their was a national campaign to act human and that seem to take.

We know the secret handshake of greeting people when we enter a store and before speaking to someone in a place like Galeries Lafayette. And never touch anything in a small store.

I am native NY'er and the only time I had my pocket picked was in Istanbul a few years ago and I had put my wallet in my front pocket. I still would return to Turkey. One incident is not going to spoil a country for me, I will leave that to Erdogan.

Many times in Paris, thankfully never had those problems, the opposite, people being helpful but one time I was going to sign a petition for the deaf by an American fair haired
young woman until a Frenchman shook his head saying, no, no.

BUT-I Can tell you about here in Boston/Cambridge
on the subway seeing someone trying to get into woman's handbag, a man's pants, I yell out watch your wallets
and at a bookshop, a woman wearing a backpack involved with the book was about to get her things stolen, as a guy started to dig in. As soon as I walked up to her, he ranaway.
this is part of city life, to be alert not keep your valuables easy to get at.

Pvoyaguese do these cartes de priorité actually exist then or are you having me on?

Oh Thin, I love having you on this thread. I just wish you were omnipresent on all forums in all of our alternate universes.
AZ

BTW, After the trip to Paris where everyone was rude, I would intentionally send someone in the wrong direction if someone with a French accent asked for information. Unfornately, I cannot discern the difference between a Québécoise accent and a French accent. And although I have not sent anyone in the wrong direction intentionally in 25 years those with a French accent are among the rudest visitors to NYC.

I agree with AlessandraZoe!

Sorry for your sour experiences, gram. The pickpockets are certainly not unique to Paris, and your post underscores the importance of vigilance in crowded public areas. Especially at this time of heavy tourism, the evildoers are active.

As for what you sensed as rudeness, I wonder how much is attributable to different cultural styles. Just as virtually every woman in Texas seems to start a conversation with something like "Love that color on you" every Parisian, including shopkeepers, expect to start an interaction by being greeted with "Bonjour, monsieur/madame." If that opening script is not followed, it is a faux pas which results in a cool response.

Being an American and calling the French rude just shows a total lack of respect and knowledge for a foreign culture. I sense that France, Spain, Portugal and most of the rest of Europe is not meant for those who do not or cannot, for some reason, understand that you will encounter major cultural differences as you move from place to place.

I've overheard people remaking about how rude the French are, while sipping a good Bordeaux, but when asked if they had ever been to France, said no, it's just something they heard and often repeated. Ignorant? Of course.

If you want rude, wait until you run into a group of Chinese on tour in Europe, or just about anywhere else.

Being an American and calling the French rude just shows a total lack of respect and knowledge for a foreign culture
______
What do you call a Frenchman in the US when he is rude, practicing his culture?

Do you think it is rude when a Parisian ignores you because your French is awful while the Italians, Portuguese, and Spanish are thrilled you make an attempt to speak their language?

<I live in NYC, the safest city in the world I'd agree>

Really Aliced..? Since when?

Honolulu is the safest city in the US and is number 15th of the safest cities in the world..

http://americanlivewire.com/safest-cities-in-the-world/

We really did try to always say small greetings and thank you's in French as much as possible-- but many times, for whatever reason, the waiters just spoke to us in English quickly. (our Texas accents on "Bonjour" is probably pathetic!) The restaurant prices were very high, but we tried not to express surprise. We tried not to speak loudly or smile too much. We really did try to dress in dark colors and try to fit in with others while traveling because I read about that in the Fodor's travel books. Once we were climbing a dark stairway up the bell tower of Sacre de Cour and heard some French speaking people behind us. We were about on the 200th of a very very steep stairwell, and we offered with hand gesture to let them go ahead. They probably had heard us talking English, though, and they quickly started speaking English. Quickly, they began asking friendly small talk questions as we were all climbing up a very difficult stairway. We thought, "Now these are really nice French people", and soon, we learned they were from Quebec! We laughed at our mistake. We will try to travel in Paris again and France of course! But we have very different expectations now.

Heading to Paris in a few weeks. The last time I was there was in the 80s. I thought the people were very cold on my visits back then. Loved the city...... Could have done without the people. Hoping I don't feel that way yet again. I do not recall such big problems with pickpockets back then.....

Regarding the cultural differences...... IMO they are quite minor compared to my travels to Asia! When I meet foreigners in my own country I try my best to understand their differences and give them some leeway. Happy to help when I can. I did not find the French to be that way. More annoyed than anything!

Love Texas! Could easily live there. I smile at people I meet all the time. It's nice to get a smile in return.

The restaurant prices are high because you chose restaurants with high prices.. it can be that simple.. I don't find the prices high because I choose restaurants within my means. The law in France requires all restaurants and cafes to post their menus OUTSIDE so anyone can check out prices before sitting down.. guess you didn't know that or you wouldn't have been surprised.. bet you also paid 4 or 5 euros for a coke, lol and bought bottled water, I don't do that either..

next time do more research it really does pay off..

Its ok to smile and wear something other then black .. its more about general behaviour and your expectations.. in the States I realize its fairly common for a waiter to come up to the table, smile widely and proclaim "hello there , my name is bobby and I am going to be serving you tonight, so you just let me know what I can do for you, etc " A French waiter would never do this( thank goodness I hate that sort of service) They will say bonjour, take your order and that's it.. when you want the bill you often have to catch their eye and motion for it etc. They won't chat, they are not going to ask "so where are you from "( generally) etc.. in other words it may really look unfriendly to you, but its normal there..

The restaurant prices are high because you chose restaurants with high prices.. it can be that simple.. I don't find the prices high because I choose restaurants within my means. The law in France requires all restaurants and cafes to post their menus OUTSIDE so anyone can check out prices before sitting down.. guess you didn't know that or you wouldn't have been surprised.. bet you also paid 4 or 5 euros for a coke, lol and bought bottled water, I don't do that either..

next time do more research it really does pay off..

Its ok to smile and wear something other then black .. its more about general behaviour and your expectations.. in the States I realize its fairly common for a waiter to come up to the table, smile widely and proclaim "hello there , my name is bobby and I am going to be serving you tonight, so you just let me know what I can do for you, etc " A French waiter would never do this( thank goodness I hate that sort of service) They will say bonjour, take your order and that's it.. when you want the bill you often have to catch their eye and motion for it etc. They won't chat, they are not going to ask "so where are you from "( generally) etc.. in other words it may really look unfriendly to you, but its normal there..

The French people who sit on the benches outside Balthazar are pretty grim looking, I agree. They probably can't get a table inside.

The French people who come into L'Ecole at the French Culinary Institute are also rude with their flip-flops, dirty feet and Muji shopping bags.

Quelle horror!

Soho is sooooo overrun with French people acting rudely whilst looking for Crate and Barrel.

I say Send Them to the Guillotine!!!!!


Thin

<Love Texas! Could easily live there. I smile at people I meet all the time. It's nice to get a smile in return>

Well said Simpsonc510..
I am European but I live in central Texas. The Friendliness of the people,their willingness to help their neighbors when is needed, their smiles and their hello when they see you even if you are a total stranger, always make my day more pleasant.As the old saying...

<The Magic of a smile..>and is so true especially if you have a bad day and feel blue.

I have been to Paris since I were 18..My sister and some members of my family live in France..

Some Parisians are indeed rude , very indifferent and arrogants..is true..

Luckily these people are only a minority because the majority of French in general are very nice.

The French people who sit on the benches outside Balthazar are pretty grim looking, I agree. They probably can't get a table inside.
_____
Or could be that Balthazar is tourists looking for celebrities that left 15 years ago.

We were in Paris just a few years ago. We saw some scams and avoided a few others by dumb luck really. I did not find the people rude. I didn't find them overly friendly either. I speak only the please and thank yous in French. We are usually obviously Americans on our travels and probably dress that way as well.

We were just in Switzerland and Italy for two weeks and I found the Romans were more cold and spoke English immediately to us. People were friendlier in northern Italy and Switzerland. I think in Switzerland, we were taken for Germans quite often which probably helped us.
One woman said something rude to me in English in a store about not giving her the proper pleasantry upon entry. I was preoccupied at the time and I just looked at her and walked out of her store. I didn't need to be corrected and I am usually a friendly person. I found her rude in trying to teach me her ways. Oh well.

Life in Europe is definitely different from the US. For some it may seem better, but I felt it made me appreciate what I have here and learn from how others do things. Travel is a learning experience.
I think like any other city, people are colder in big cities, New York too. I found I liked the smaller cities on our latest travels much better than Rome. So, maybe that is a lesson learned by me. I found the people friendlier and less likely to want something from me.
I wouldn't give up on France, I would try a smaller city and see the country. Paris is like NY. Just in NY, you speak the language and can tell someone to get to the back of the line.

Well, Abilene Gram, I will say something – you certainly got a response to your post, eh? In one day – 73 and counting. Sorry about your experience though. Glad to hear that you may try again. Let us know…

MaisonPlague : Yes they exist. They are issued by the CAF, a government body (Caisse d'Allocations Familiales). There are priority lines in most supermarkets for people who have mobility issues and for pregnant women. There are also priority cards for pregnant women at Disneyland Paris. It seems that contrary to some, they do take local customes into consideration.

I think that Florentines can come across as haughty and Romans can be quite sarcastic (in a funny way). So what. I'm not out to make friends with everyone who crosses my path in a big city that I am visiting as a tourist. And once you understand that people operate according to a completely different code of behavior than you do, you'll have a much better experience--anywhere.

I think I've been to Paris about seven times now and I haven't had any Parisians be rude to me except for one late-teen guy working in a shop once and he was just a snotty teenager. I can get really haughty, snotty and snobby myself and gave what I got x10.

Luckily, haven't been swindled in Paris, a beautiful city with loads to do and see, and lots of courteous, formal people. Excellent.

Oops, I got carried away with my self-important blathering and forgot to address Gram! I am sorry you had a bad experience, and I hope you give France another chance.

And AjPeabody, Apple picking I've not heard. Here they used to call it iJacking.

Responding to some people on this forum is pretty much a waste of time. They are set in their ways and unless you fit their mold of politeness, you are rude, which includes most of the known world outside of NYC, but thankfully they do not reflect the city, only their narrow mindset.

What Robert3533 said. I don't much care if the OP ever goes back to France or just stays in Texas (which scares the hell out of me personally). I don't waste time responding to these zenophobic, narrow-minded posts any more. I've seen thousands upon thousands of clueless Americans in France and wondered how the world got to be a place where anyone with a few thousand dollars could venture abroad and hope to be entertained in the way they're used to at home without any language skills or appreciation for differences in cultures.

So be it. Carry on. Stay away from France. It's too weird. Go to Vegas.