How old was your child when you went on vacation without him/her?
 

My husband and I would like to go to Europe for about 10 days next Spring. Our first child will be about 1 year old at that time. My question is how old was your child when you went? How did you feel? Any advice to encourage us to go????

JB<BR><BR>You obviously feel guilty about this and want some strangers to reassure that going is okay. It's normal to feel guilty over an issue like this. If you have someone you trust and know well to take care of the baby, then go and enjoy yourself. If I were leaving my baby with my mother in law, whom I trust dearly and know well, then I would go and feel okay with this decision.

Ah DrFreud,<BR><BR>You have great insight...I am not sure if I will feel guilty, miserable or liberated. That is the problem!<BR><BR>JB

Under 4 1/2 - we have nice Grandparents.....

Babykins will be fine. What about you? I simply could not handle leaving mine emotionally even though I knew full well they would be okay. I just couldn't enjoy myself for more than about four days away from them. Some of my friends had no problems, and I did not feel they were less of a good parent nor did I feel I was a better parent for my choice. You will have to decide what will work for you. PJK

I'm very lucky that I have parents that are healthy and were always willing and able to look after my children. I think both my kids were under 6 months old when I did it. Granted, the first time it wasn't as far as Europe, but when my daughter was approx. 10 months old we went to europe for 8 days. Can't say I felt guilty. I had a great time because I knew my kids were being cared by their loving grandparents. I think the key is it depends who will be taking care of them.

jb, You didn't answer Dr. Freud's question re sitters. If you have family you totally trust, you may feel guilty, but the baby will be fine. <BR><BR>I have to wonder if you are a troll trying to stir up controversy. I gather your baby is only a few months old, if he or she will be one year old next spring. Most people do change their lifestyles when they become parents. Many parents would never consider leaving a child so young for ten days for a pleasure trip to Europe. Just me, I guess, but I'm biting. I'll start the controversy. I'll call you self-centered and immature.

I wouldn't be able to enjoy a ten-day vacation without my daughter 'cause I'd miss her to much (we did go away for a weekend when she was 10 months old though). My husband and I love to travel, so we just take her with us. Any reason you can't do that? It didn't slow us down much and it was really fun seeing her reaction to things (Vancouver, London and Costa Rica so far, and she's only 20 months old!)

JB, by the time your child is 1 year old you will be stressed enough: just go, who cares where :) <BR><BR>If you can leave the baby with people you trust it will be much easier for the child to be away then for you. <BR><BR>Definitely go! <BR><BR>Now, if you want to drug the baby along that's a totally different story.

You shouldn't be asking Fodors this question, you should be asking yourselves this question. <BR>Sounds like you are having "being an adult/parent" anxiety after the birth of your child. Try going someplace closer where you can return easily if you want/need to.

Why do people with kids keep wanting to get rid of them? Now, it's babies!!! it's important to spend time with your husband, but that's too long to leave a baby. You probably aren't even breastfeeding, you've got the rest of your life to spend with your husband, take your baby with you.

We took our son along for the first two years. After we had two, it became impractical. The thought of the plane flight alone, kept us home for the next two years. But then, when they were two and four, we were able to go to Europe for 9 days. We are lucky enough to have multiple family members who would stay at OUR house with them (Very important in my book). They each took three days, and the kids loved it. Now, two years later, we're off to London and Prague on Friday, and the kids are looking forward to the change in routine. We do have one rule, though; we don't drive a car while we're away. It is, after all, the most dangerous every day thing you do. Good luck.

We went away for five days on a driving trip when our daughter was 7 months old. We went to Italy for nearly two weeks when she was 2 1/2. It really all depends on the child and the guardian. We trust my wife's mother to take good care of her, and our daughter has never minded when we go away for a while. We let her stay at her grandmother's a few weekends first to see how she did, and it was clear from the beginning that there would be no problem. Now of course children can be more "clingy" at some ages than at others, and you really have to judge for yourself based on these factors.

We once left our kids, aged 2 and 5, with a grandparent while we went to Spain for 3 weeks. This was after we had schlepped these same kids to Europe for several weeks the year before and the year before that (we travel with kids no matter what age they are). It was rough because we knew that Granny didn't exactly have the same rules we did with regard to feeding kids (she thought MacDonalds three times a day was cool - we didn't; but we survived the experience and so did the kids) I missed my kids a lot, and called home often to speak to them. It was kind of an aberration - we've brought them along on every European trip since then and never had to deal with the "missing the kids" syndrome since, so in hindsight it was just a blip on the screen and my kids are now great European travelers.<BR>It wasn't fun being away from a 2-year-old, though, so I can appreciate your concern. A 1-year-old I don't think will even know you're gone if you make sure he/she has an appropriate surrogate.

My son was 4.<BR>I worried.<BR>Only advice would be to be sure you know and trust the babysitter.

Our daughter was 17 yrs old. We had family vacations until then. At 17 we felt we could trust her and a girlfriend at home alone. Big mistake. She had a party with 150 high school seniors present. You do your best, some decisions are not so good, that was one of our worst.

We left our daughter for 4 days to go to Cozumel when she was 18 months old. I didn't have any problems until the night before we left - and then it was awful. Since then I have come to expect this sudden anxiety just before we leave and About every other time, we actually re-write our Will to make me feel better. She is 15 now and we are all heading to Scandinavia next week - They grow up fast!

Dan's idea of one or two practice weekends first is good, then you will know better how you and your child will cope.

If you have terrific care for your child, go. I always felt I would enjoy taking my kids on that sort of vacation much more when I knew they would be old enough to get something out of it. Now that they're older, I can hardly imagine travelling without them. But I'm glad I had a few breaks when they were babies & toddlers. Self-centered and immature? gee, never thought of it that way, since the other 358 days a year I was trying to be the best mom in the world...

My son was 1 and a half when I went to Europe. I left him to my mom whom I trust. If you can leave him to someone you FULLY trust I would say go. It will be great for your marriage! SO you can say in the long run is for the benefit of your child. That is how I managed to convince myself into going.