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-   -   Help me bribe the grandparents -- I NEED a week away from my kids! (https://www.fodors.com/community/europe/help-me-bribe-the-grandparents-i-need-a-week-away-from-my-kids-693929/)

taitai Apr 11th, 2007 09:32 AM

I so totally sympathize. I have three toddler boys and a huge travel bug and they don't always go together. We manage one solo trip a year and are fortunate that we have grandparents willing to help out. However, even with one set of grandparents in the house, we still get a babysitter to help out during the day. It just makes it so much easier for them, especially during what in our house is worst time...the cranky hours before dinner is served. I also prepare a sheet with all the schedules and numbers. I even program the pediatrician and Children's Hospital into the GPS system of the cars we leave behind (neither set of grandparents live in our area of the country so they are not familiar with where everything is). Finally, I alert all of our wonderful neighbors who are terrific about checking in and including the grandparents in whatever activity is going on that day (there is always something around here).

When we travel with the kids, we always bring a babysitter and/or the grandparents. Our most recent trip to the Carribean provided us a bounty of help as the babysitter was joined by BOTH sets of grandparents. Wasn't our original plan but after just getting dumped on day after day by huge snowstorms in the East, our parents needed a break and the fares weren't outrageous and we were able to get a couple extra rooms.....

Good luck with whatever you work out. You aren't crazy to want to get away. Just recognize that caring for three toddlers is not easy and getting your mom some help will make the most sense for everyone.

taitai

dgg Apr 11th, 2007 09:48 AM

Oops! Hit post too soon! Meant to say...

A mother needs to get away. Your children are a little young to leave alone with one caregiver for a week (even though you are expected to take care of them alone everyday.) If your mom takes them, she's a saint. Once the oldest is around five or six and the babies are in preschool, you should be able to get away more easily.

Can you and your husband take a long weekend near your home? Would your husband and mom consider teaming up to watch them while you went away alone for 4-5 days?

The first time I went away alone after having my children was FANTASTIC. Of course, I missed DH & the kids, and I was ready to come home after 5 days. However, I must admit there was no better feeling than being able to wake up in the morning whenever I wanted, eat whenever I wanted, sleep whenever I wanted, and run out the door for a jog without giving a thought to anyone else's needs. It had been a long time since I had done that. Maybe that's what you need. It also helped in the romance area since I felt more like a person than a serv-o-mat when I got back. I went to Rome by the way.






dgg Apr 11th, 2007 09:55 AM

When our oldest was about a year old, we went on a trip with another couple their child the same age. We took along our full-time live-in nanny (I worked then). It was awful. We found ourselves looking after the comfort of the nanny and the kids wanted to be with us anyway.

mebe Apr 11th, 2007 10:03 AM

Dgg -- that's it! I'll go to Europe for a week and leave DH to watch the kids! I love it, not sure if DH will... :)


laustic Apr 11th, 2007 10:36 AM

I can totally sympathize too! I am a major travel fanatic. Our only child is three. We were basically inseparable for the first 2 years of her life. When I traveled, she came with me -- Mexico, Bahamas, Chicago, D.C., Colorado. She was more a world traveler in her first year of life than I was by the time I was 20!

Once she turned 2 everything changed! I'm a stay at home mom and I needed a break BIG time and I've been on 2 big trips without her since then. Dh and I went to Mexico for a week long cooking school vacation the month after she turned 2 and it was such a wonderful trip. Then in June of last year I went on a 10 day girls trip to London -- one of the best trips of my life. Dh worked from home a lot and my sister-in-law and cousins helped out as well. We're going to Jamaica for a week this June. I feel a twinge of guilt for not taking her, but I also realize how important it is to do something for myself now and then and we are amazingly lucky to have an army of people that want to watch our little girl anytime.

These trips totally revitalized me! Getting away each time made me feel more independent and I felt like a better mom when I got home.

For now I'd recommend a weekend away or go on a cruise and take mom with you! Might not be the most romantic option, but it could get you a night or two alone! The boys will grow up faster than you'd like and you'll be in a good position to start taking trips again soon!

kelliebellie Apr 11th, 2007 10:38 AM

I did go to Ireland for 2 weeks with my husband's mother and left our daughter home with my husband and my parents. He was nice about letting me go, but I don't think it will be an annual thing!

dgg Apr 11th, 2007 06:53 PM

Mebe, I don't know if you're being sarcastic, but if you're not, and need your husband's blessing, just get that glazed over look in your eyes. It worked for me!

laustic Apr 12th, 2007 05:34 AM

Hey, I'm a big advocate of taking a trip w/o the fam on occasion. I've left dh behind on a couple of trips and sure I missed him, but everyone has to have some time away! And he has his guy's weekend trips. It works out for everyone!

Get with your girlfriends and see if they are interested! Or just go completely alone. I have another friend that does that -- just goes on trips alone (Santa Fe, New York, etc.) goes to museums, shops, gets spa treatments. For her the solitude is a nice break. I'm a social traveler though and like to have someone to share the experience with, but to each his/her own! For me just flying on a plane w/o kids is like a little mini-vacation!

almcd Apr 12th, 2007 05:59 AM

Take this story with you.
Grandson: "Grandpa, can you make a noise like a frog?"

Grandpa: "Yes. I think I can. Why?"

Grandson: "Because my Dad says that when you croak, we are all going to Disneyland!"

dgg Apr 12th, 2007 07:41 AM

The setup...several years ago...four kids and a broad age span. I went 13 years with at least one child in diapers at all times. My handbag of choice was a diaper bag. On a trip to New York, I picked up a knock off Kate Spade handbag in Chinatown, but didn't bother with it because I'm carrying a diaper bag all the time. A solo trip to DC falls into my lap.

Cool...hubby has the kids and I get a long weekend with my fun extended (adult) family and friends to celebrate a special event.

So, I'm very excited to be out and about alone. I woke up, dressed in some trendy clothes, put on my heels, packed my single suitcase and grabbed my never-been-used Kate Spade bag. It's summer and I've got a short sleeved top on. I'm strutting through the terminal in Atlanta like I own the place, feeling very chic, carrying that Kate Spade bag (and not a diaper bag hanging off a stroller). The walk to the gate is very long and I notice a slightly sticky sensation on the inside of my elbow. I'm in a hurry so I just keep strutting through the terminal not thinking much of it. Cooly, I turn into the gate and take my place in line to speak to the agent. Certainly no one knows I'm really a housewife and mom of 4 little kids. Drop the suitcase and look down at my arm...lo and behold...THE LABEL FROM MY FAKE KATE SPADE BAG HAD BEEN STUCK TO MY ARM FOR THE ENTIRE TREK THROUGH HARTSFIELD AIRPORT!!!

What a dork!


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