mariacallas

And if you don't wear a hat there, you're all invited to my french hat luncheon on my back patio under the magnolia blossoms.

Some folks stateside might think it brash, but I find I'm my best peering out from a fabulish hat - preferably a straw, and from Neimans or Hats on Post. Mais oui!

We'll have champagne, quailles aux raisins, and of course a fine pate with cornichons. Oooo lala.

DeborahAnn

mariacallas, I'd love to wear a hat at your French hat luncheon. May I wear my Dents (established in 1777) hat from England? The weather must be sunny and mild as this hat is made out of paper straw and I think it will dissolve if it were to rain Deborah

mariacallas

I did this one time. We also had salad with goat cheese rolled in walnuts and toasted - divine.

The champagne was just so darned good we decided to break out then hubby's wine collection. He was not amused, but we sure had fun.

Some of us traded hats at each course, and we traded seats also. It was great great fun - a hell of a lot more fun that that husband was. Tee hee!

ggreen

I have been to three weddings in France in the past 10 years or so. (None were in Paris; all three couples were French citizens.) Most of the French women wore simple, elegant dresses or skirt suits and matching hats - think of the Astor races scene in My Fair Lady, or as someone else posted, Four Weddings and a Funeral. I really wanted to bring a hat, but it was too much of an inconvenience since my trips were always combined with additional touring for vacation - I just didn't have the wherewithall to carry a hat box! However at these weddings, everyone seemed very impressed that we travelled overseas to be there, and it wasn't expected that Americans would wear the same attire as the French.

My suggestion would be to wear what is comfortable - the comments about long evenings is very true! And lots of dancing! And I'd agree no solid black, either. I personally haven't seen people changing attire between ceremony and party, though the hats tend to disappear by the time dinner is served.

Also, DeborahAnn, we went to a wedding three years ago in the Loire in July. It was quite warm during the day but chilly by the time things wrapped up in the wee hours the next morning - a wrap with my dress worked well. A wedding I went to in Brittany in April was very cool, and the stone church was damp and chilly...

Each of the weddings included a lengthy church service - significantly longer than most services I'm used to here in the US - followed by a cocktail hour then seated dinner under tents in a backyard or other grassy place. The traditional French "wedding cake" is a conical pile of profiteroles - yummy! There's a dance floor and late at night, another round of food such as crepes and coffee to keep the party going. Oh and during dinner people swing their table napkins over their heads to get the couple to kiss (instead of the clinking glasses we do here)!

I will say that these weddings were of old-school, middle-class families, and it's my understanding that wedding protocol does vary, though I'm not sure if that's because of class or location or what... I would ask your friend - or her fiance directly if possible - to tell you what to expect for the style of wedding and reception.

Lastly, my friends had a registry, perhaps to accomodate their bi-continental guests. They had not lived together prior to marriage, so they asked for a lot of household items. If your friend will be living in France, a nice memento from where you live would be appropriate - a bowl from a local potter, etc. But again with the travelling involved, and if you decide against shipping to them, you may want to give them cash - always welcome, and it sounds appropriate given the bride's cultural background!

Have a GREAT time!!

DeborahAnn

ggreen, thanks for the helpful post. I am waiting for information from the mother of the groom. The family lives in Paris, has an apartment in Metz and another home in the Auvergne. They are wealthy but conservative so I really don't know what to expect regarding this wedding. Julien and Claire have been living together for a couple of years and have an apartment full of things so I am also waiting for gift suggestions from the family. I am getting rather impatient with all this waiting

I have been "racking" my brain trying to think of something special from our area. They gave my daughter several beautiful Baccarat pieces for her wedding gift because of their connection to the Lorraine region; our Maryland crabs rather pale in comparison

The family has been a little vague yet with details but I gather the wedding will take place at a chateau with expansive grounds so I should prepare for just about anything. Thank you for reminding me that it might get cool even in the Camargue area on an August evening. I know it is possible for the wedding celebration to last through the night and include breakfast. This is the impression my French teacher gave me when she described her brother's wedding in Annecy.

The family has told us that our presence is all they desire; which is exactly what we told them when they came to our daughter's wedding!!!

This wedding is very special to us and I want our presence and our presents to show how dear they are to us. Thanks for any suggestions. Deborah

mariacallas

Crystal or silver is always appropriate, no matter where one hails from.

julies

Perhaps a very nice tray--silver or some of those newer mixes that don't need polishing. It would also be easy to pack in the bottom of your suitcase. A very nice silver picture frame or set of frames would also be easy to pack. My one caution would be to see if they prefer a more contemporary or a more traditional look.

DeborahAnn

Julies and mariacallas, thanks for the suggestions, hopefully kittycatangel finds this helpful.

I was thinking that possibly something in pewter (Paul Revere or on that order). The young couple's apartment had a heavy tropical theme, they love the Dominican Republic, trying to think if I can give them something from the US that might fit their interests or just cave in and give them money.

How much thought do you put into a wedding gift? Deborah

mariacallas

The same amount they put into yours.

laclaire

I have been to Jewish weddings in France, and they were extremely formal. Of course, at the orthodox one, all the women wore full skirts and long sleeves, and matching hats were a huge accessory, particularly for the married women who wanted to keep their hair covered in a stylish way.

At the less orthodox wedding, everyone was in full out evening gowns. The wedding was on Saturday night after the end of Shabbat and though lots of the dresses were sleeveless or spaghetti straps, everyone had a matching shawl. The men wore gorgeous suits and were very formal.

One of those weddings was in Paris, the other in Villefranche.

Underhill

Since the couple likes things from the Dominican Republic, check to see whether novica.com has anything of interest at the moment. You can find a multitude of things from various tropical locales there.

DeborahAnn

You are all wonderfully helpful. I have to just hope this is not going to be as formal a wedding as attended by leclaire

Underhill, that web site is fantastic. Right away I saw a sculpture called everlasting kiss, even if we gave a gift of silver or money, what newlyweds wouldn't like such a perfect symbol of the love they have for each other. I am wearing my rose colored glasses today Deborah

DeborahAnn

kittycat, I hope you receive some helpful suggestions for wedding gifts. It sounds like your clothing choice is right on.

I just found out our friends are registered at Galeries Lafayette. I was surprised to see most of the gifts requested involved expenses for their honeymoon. I wonder if that means they won't go if they don't get enough contributors Deborah

ggreen

DeborahAnn, I'm glad I could be of help! It sounds like your wedding is very similar to the ones I've gone to. However, what you said about the registry suprises me, because for my friends' weddings, the honeymoon is determined by the groom and a complete surprise to the bride. (He even packs for her so she won't know what climate to expect!) Since this was true for all three weddings I went to, I thought it was maybe a "French" thing...

[FYI about the honeymoon registry: We were just at a wedding in NY where they registered for their honeymoon at a site called HoneyLuna.com. I asked my friend what they would do if their requests weren't all filled, and she said there was a way to take the trip even if all items weren't paid for by guests...]

I wanted to share some of the photos from that most recent wedding I went to in France. I just made my first attempt at creating an online photo site, so we'll see how this goes! (I use Shutterfly to share photos with friends, and they have a new feature for creating your own "collection" - this is a first try!) Please tell me if there's any trouble accessing the following: http://ggak.shutterfly.com/action. If the site opens, use the View Slideshow feature to see my comments about each... (Comments are brief because Shutterfly only allows 80 chars. I tried to include as many "attire" photos as I could find!)

mariacallas

most hatty. I'd be right at home there as my beautiful hat collection is feeling quite forgotten here in no hat unless it has a logo - land.

C'est dommage.

DeborahAnn

ggreen, looking forward to seeing your photos. I was a little dismayed about the honeymoon trip registry inclusion.

I have finally heard from both the groom to be and FoG. Many of the wedding festivities will take place in Saintes Maries de la Mer; including on Sunday playing with bulls or cows at some arena. I think this is going to be "a wild and wooly" wedding The FoG has included "and a special surprise" after listing many of the activities. Now off to view your photos, I just love to see wedding pictures. Deborah

DeborahAnn

ggreen, those are fantastic, what unbelievable hats. Now I am really going to panic, how will I ever be able to pack light for this trip. I can't wait to show my daughter. The one hat that looked like a tree branch with colored leaves was hysterical (a million pardons if that was you) Hope others will take the time to look at your pictures. Do you have any more from the wedding? It looks beautiful. Thank you so much, Deborah

sheila

Sainte Marie de la Mer is a very special place. I read something about it not that long ago. In the Camargue? And the saint is the patron saint of the gypsies? (I use the word advisedly)

DeborahAnn

ggreen, I showed your pictures to my husband and now HE wants to wear a hat. Why were so many of the gentlemen wearing the straw boating hat we wondered. I told my husband they all worked at the same company and HE would be allowed to wear a hat

Yes, Sheila we were in Saintes Maries de la Mer one year on the festival of the Gypsies. It was unlike anything I had seen before. Unfortunately it was also very crowded and we came and left within just a couple of hours. I never expected to be returning for a wedding. I am afraid being there the first weekend in August is also going to be very crowded
Deborah

ggreen

I *so* wanted to wear a hat, especially to this last wedding. When I returned stateside, I saw one in a shop window that would have been perfect: the exact shade of fuschia as my dress, and about 3 feet in diameter! mariacallas, I admire you for having a hat collection - I hope you wear them regardless!

The woman with the "tree" hat is a sister of the bride! The hat was made by a cousin (who had an even more outrageous topper of which I unfortunately don't have a good pic); the cousin is an artist, and the family loves whatever she comes up with. I do think that there is an element of outrageousness that can be shown off at these weddings whereas day-to-day attire is more conservative and almost "preppy".

As much as I wanted to wear a hat, I definitely didn't feel out of place without one. (You can see in the crowd photos that there are other women without hats.) So it's great if you manage to pull it off, but don't worry about it. (And if you do, you'll have to tell me how you manage to transport it!)

When I was reviewing my photos, I noticed all the men in boaters. (I'd only remembered the children in the wedding party wearing them.) I will have to ask my friend if that's a regular thing in summer, or if there was a specific reason for it. They do look sharp, though, don't they?

Unfortunately my photos from the earlier weddings are film, not digital, so there's no easy way to post them. I don't have a lot of pics from this last wedding because I was having too much fun to remember to take photos!