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Old Jan 22nd, 2012, 03:31 PM
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Eloping In Italy? Please help

So my fiance and I have decided to forgo a traditional wedding, and would like to elope in Italy (we are open to getting married before we leave and having a symbolic ceremony in italy). We have never been out of the country and need help. We are hoping to get married April 13, 2013 and want the entire trip to be about 13 days including fly in and fly out. We live in Los Angeles, and would like something romantic and intimate. We would love to maybe rent a villa somewhere and spend time exploring local markets/restaurants. We would maybe like to see venice, tuscany, rome, and the amalfi coast. I don't know what is possible or makes logistical sense. Please please help us.

signed,
In love and looking for adventure

Also, any ideas for ceremony locations? it will just be the two of us and whoever marries us
Kanvis is offline  
Old Jan 22nd, 2012, 03:33 PM
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Actually the word "eloping" is misleading. We are of age, and it's not going to be a secret. We just want to have a private ceremony and kick-butt honeymoon.
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Old Jan 22nd, 2012, 03:55 PM
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There isn't really an easy way to do this. Search for threads on weddings in Italy -- there are lots of them -- and you will see that to get married in Italy will require a lot of paper work, all in Italian or having to be translated into Italian. This will require you to hire a wedding agent to manage this for you. They exist.

I am pretty sure you can't get married here and then get married again there. If you are married here, you can't have a civil wedding there (judge or justice of the peace type of thing) because you will already be married. If you are Roman Catholic, I assume you could have a church wedding, but you would have to find an English speaking priest, go through Church instruction and so forth.

You can always have a kick butt honeymoon.
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Old Jan 22nd, 2012, 04:12 PM
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I see no reason why the two of you couldn't repeat your vows in Italy, after marrying in the US. That doesn't mean you can get any sort of official to do it for you, but you can always have the two of you and a photographer. There was a very similar plan discussed here in the last several months.

You can't see all the major parts of Italy AND rent a villa.

For 11 nights in country, pick three destinations. It is often mentioned here that since most US flights leave Venice at a very early hour, it is more convenient to fly IN to Venice and Out of Rome.

So spend 3 or 4 nights in Venice,

then 3 or 4 nights somewhere in Tuscany

and then 3 or 4 nights in Rome.

To go all the way from Venice to the Amalfi Coast is just a bit too far, IMO. I would suggest loping off either your northernmost or southernmost destination.

On our honeymoon we went from Rome to Umbria to Florence to Venice and we were the walking dead by the time we hit Venice. We've since learned not to cram quite so much into our trips.
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Old Jan 22nd, 2012, 04:16 PM
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Well said above---I concur.
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Old Jan 22nd, 2012, 04:18 PM
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We got married in Germany and I assume that some of the procedures are the same .... you can do it yourself if you have the language of the country. In our case it took us quite a long time to get the process underway because we needed to have several interviews with the registrar (in German) assessing whether we were ready for marriage or not (standard) and have our papers translated to German, after which they went to the state high court for assessment. We also had to have statements witnessed by a local notary stating that we were legally free to get married, which was an arduous process to obtain in one of our cases through no fault of ours. The entire process took several months and the assessment by the high court took 6 weeks. After this they offered us one of 2 dates for the civil marriage, to be held in the registry. I imagine if we had wanted some time in the future this might have been possible too, but of course you would have to negotiate this. Finally, when we married we also needed an interpreter as my husband's German is not as strong as mine and the registrar insisted on this. It is after all a life decision you are taking and you would want to understand every word. So my advice to you is that you start the process by writing to the authorities in the place you want to get married and ask them for a list of the paperwork you will need, to get started. Seek out local translators who will be accredited by a body that the registry will recognise. You may find that a sticking point is that you are both foreigners and you may be asked to show proof from your home country that you are free to marry. It's possible, but I think if you are prepared for the hurdles and don't take it personally if there are hitches, and if you can back everything up with paperwork you will be OK. Good luck!

Lavandula
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Old Jan 22nd, 2012, 04:44 PM
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Thank you so much for the responses. I think we should fly into Venice, hit Tuscany, and fly out of Rome. I think you guys are right, we will probably have a small ceremony in LA or SF and then just maybe repeat our vows privately somewhere in Italy. Thank you for everything
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Old Jan 22nd, 2012, 06:34 PM
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Yup, Kanvis, that's the way to do it. Otherwise you're looking at mountains of red tape and bureaucracy or a huge wad of cash. There are plenty of ways to make a "ceremony" yourself once in Italy. I would actually think that a hotel concierge might have some creative and inexpensive ideas for you if you just said you wanted to repeat your vows there.
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Old Jan 22nd, 2012, 06:41 PM
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Oh, I hope you aren't done with us; we can help a lot more. I was getting into the honeymoon thing, and too many people come here and reject our suggestions out of hand. You sound so reasonable.
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Old Jan 22nd, 2012, 07:36 PM
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Kanvis, we're getting married in Italy this year. Our parents are coming too, they just don't know that we are getting married. Hehehe.

For what it is worth - the procedures are not all that difficult. You just need to read up very carefully on what is required and follow it to the letter. We've worked closely with our consulate in Italy to make sure that we've done the right thing each step of the way.

As we are not Roman Catholic and wish to be married in Venice, we are being married in the city office which is basically a beautiful palace / gorgeous old building. We pay 1600 Euros for the privilege.

The requirements of what paperwork is necessary vary depending on your nationality. As I'm a New Zealander, don't follow my requirements & assume they'll be the same for you. But I'll give you an idea of what we've had to do so you can realize it's all pretty easy (just a bit pricey!).

We had to supply birth certificates to our Internal Affair Department and fill in an application called the "Certificate of No Impediment to Marriage". This took about 2 weeks and cost ~E80. We had to get one certificate for each of us. It is basically telling folks in Italy that there's no reason why you can't be married. I.e. you're not married already etc etc.

We then filled in another form & paid money to our consulate in Rome (can't remember exactly how much, maybe another E100??). This application was called the Nulla Ostra. Our consulate sends this form back to us in NZ and we have to bring it with us to the city office in Venice.

We were able to book the wedding date online and the Venice city office have been charmingly helpful. We applied for our preferred wedding date about 7 months before the actual ceremony date.

Many people tried to put us off with claims of red tape but we've found it pretty straightforward and everyone we have had to deal with has been incredibly helpful.

Best of luck whatever you decide.
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Old Jan 22nd, 2012, 08:18 PM
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Thank you for the advice for the wedding certificate My fiance and I are deciding to be extremely greedy. We originally planned to have this really expensive extravagant wedding, but decided to write a "honeymoon bucket list." We made a list of things that would enrich our lives, things we would remember, and which would celebrate our love. I'm gonna type the list here, please offer suggestions, itineraries, tips on how we can make them happen

So we are getting married in Napa, really small just us and maybe our immediate family and then going to a restaurant for dinner.
The days before the wedding we would like to 1.bike across the Golden Gate bridge. While in napa we would like to do a 2. hot air balloon ride.

We will then head to Italy where we would like to 3. Take a gondola ride in Venice 4. rent a little villa/apartment in Tuscany 5. have authentic gelato and pasta 6. see the Colosseum 7. have ice cream on the Spanish steps 8. Visit the Sistine Chapel 10. have a romantic picnic in Florence

On our one month anniversary we are going to Hawaii where we want to 11. zipline 12. go to a luau 13. take a nap in a hammock 14. watch the sun rise on Haleakala in Maui 15. Drive the road to Hana 16. Take a helicopter ride and see a volcano 17. have a night swim with manta rays 18. stargaze at Mauna Kea

This will all cost about the same as a big wedding
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Old Jan 23rd, 2012, 12:17 AM
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You sound like two wise people who will have memories to share as long as you are together.
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Old Feb 4th, 2012, 04:35 AM
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I'd do it in Siena town hall, friends did it and got a Mini into the town square to make the day
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Old Feb 4th, 2012, 02:00 PM
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OK, for the villa in tuscany, there are a zillion possibilities. Try VRBO.com, (Vacation Rental By Owner) or just google Vacation Rentals Tuscany and see what comes up. TripAdvisor is another good source. Tuscany is a pretty big place, so perhaps you should narrow that down by looking at a map. Siena is a popular destination. Really a lovely place. there are lots of little places near Siena.

Be sure you look for reviews of places you like, Not just on the owner's website, which may be limited to only positive raves. TripAdvisor or SloowTrav.com are good for this.
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Old Feb 4th, 2012, 02:12 PM
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I have good news for you : you can add one more thing to your bucket list ! I didn't see a #9...
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Old Feb 4th, 2012, 03:52 PM
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What a great way to do life..... after you reach 17 then make another list of 17 and another and another.
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