Fodor's Travel Talk Forums

Fodor's Travel Talk Forums (https://www.fodors.com/community/)
-   Europe (https://www.fodors.com/community/europe/)
-   -   Do you "vant to be alone"? (https://www.fodors.com/community/europe/do-you-vant-to-be-alone-214670/)

G. Garbo May 6th, 2002 10:45 AM

Do you "vant to be alone"?
 
So many threads lately of solo women travelers make me wonder how many women actually travel alone. Is is because you want to or because circumstances work out that it is "better than not going"? How do you find it different than traveling with the same or opposite sex. Any interesting ideas on this?

Reba S. May 6th, 2002 11:05 AM

Yes I love to travel alone so it is by choice. I am probably a little selfish but I have had too many trips ruined by companions, even those I thought I knew well. You really get to know people on trips together and not always for the best. So, yes, most of the time I vant to be alone.

Suzanne May 6th, 2002 11:18 AM

hi<BR><BR>would also be interested in how many men solo travelers there are... maybe it's just me, but I know of many more women who go it alone. (or maybe they are just more noticeable as it is slightly unusual?)<BR><BR>are your reasons the same? are you more or less likely to wait for a buddy to go with you?<BR><BR>anecdotally, I know of many more women who volunteer - they seem more likely to 'get out there' and do something unusual with their free time if they are single. just curious.<BR><BR>good topic.<BR><BR>Sue

BoredMan May 6th, 2002 11:20 AM

If the young lady vants to be alone, let her ve alone for Pete's Sake. Ve independent and enjoy ve world !...:)

elaine May 6th, 2002 11:30 AM

reasons "depend" I would imagine, it does for me.<BR>I have to be pretty close to someone and find that I know him/her very well in order to want to travel with that person (or decide that I don't want to!)<BR>I have some wonderful friends with whom I know for sure I would NOT want to travel, ditto past and present romantic friends. I know some marrieds who prefer not to travel with spouses--either spouses don't like to travel, or their schedules don't always permit them both being away at the same time (kids,work, etc).<BR>The great thing about traveling alone is obviously the independence, the being in control, the not having to answer to anyone else. Leaves me free to go find the obscure little historical hole-in-the-wall that only I would want to find.<BR>On the other hand, when I do travel with a good companion, I love the sharing aspect, someone to turn to and say "isn't this great?!" And travel can be pretty romantic, if the <BR>rental car don't break down.

Dallas May 6th, 2002 11:47 AM

I started out (many years ago) traveling alone, because it was either go alone or not go. I found to my amazement that I loved traveling solo. I have since had several opportunities for for companions -- both male and female -- and have managed to wiggle out. Maybe someday I'll give it a try, but I really don't think so. . .

Mina May 6th, 2002 11:59 AM

I travel alone, and right now in my life, I wouldn't have it any other way (I have firmly told my friends that I am going alone, when they suggest maybe they can tag along. :) ) <BR><BR>There are many reasons, some mentioned previously. Here are a few of mine:<BR><BR>1. Planning is a LOT easier. You stay where you want to stay, and don't need to consult anyone on the itinerary. This is especially nice when you are planning a trip "on the fly".<BR><BR>2. If you can get the nerve to go into a bar by yourself (and always sit AT the bar) it's far easier to meet people, both tourists and locals alike. I am 29 years old, and that probably makes it even easier to meet people, as I see a lot of people who are in their 20's-30's traveling alone.<BR><BR>3. Yeah, you pay more overall, but you have a room to yourself...very convenient if you find a studly native to have a romantic evening with. =P<BR><BR>I have been to Australia alone (my first big trip solo) and have done some ski trips alone. In the next year, I will be going to Ireland, then Spain solo. Traveling with other people is definitely fun...but traveling alone is something really special.

Suzanne May 6th, 2002 12:02 PM

hi<BR><BR>would also be interested in how many men solo travelers there are... maybe it's just me, but I know of many more women who go it alone. (or maybe they are just more noticeable as it is slightly unusual?)<BR><BR>are your reasons the same? are you more or less likely to wait for a buddy to go with you?<BR><BR>anecdotally, I know of many more women who volunteer - they seem more likely to 'get out there' and do something unusual with their free time if they are single. just curious.<BR><BR>good topic.<BR><BR>Sue

vy May 6th, 2002 12:09 PM

vy is it, that some people will let you do the traveling, shrug their shoulders when you ask them their preferences, then complain or dislike what you've picked to see/do? Grrrr. I can definitely understand the urge to go solo.

vy May 6th, 2002 12:09 PM

vy is it, that some people will let you do the travel planning, shrug their shoulders when you ask them their preferences, then complain or dislike what you've picked to see/do? Grrrr. I can definitely understand the urge to go solo.

Lynn May 6th, 2002 12:13 PM

I was married very happily for 20 years and my husband and I travelled together very well (after the initial settling in period). After he died when I was still very young, (well relative to now- I'm 75), I just didn't want to sit but somehow thought a girlfriend would be "second best" after my special travelling buddy. <BR><BR>Alone is better for me because I can do as I wish when I wish. I like to "people watch" in hotel lobbies or cafes and happily will chat to others on trains if they seem so inclined.As an "old broad" I am considered "safe" for young people, both male and female to talk to. I always travel with a very good novel for quiet times. <BR><BR>I have met and stayed in contact with young pals from all over the world by smiling at folks with rings in their noses and orange hair- they are often willing to confide loneliness and missing parents to me in a way I think they would hesitate to do with younger people. They also appreciate my travel tips as I like they am on a budget-I know working mens' cafes and tavla caldas in 13 countries. <BR><BR>I'm not quite ready to hang up my back-pack and sneakers yet and I am happy to see my friends when I return...they think I am a lunatic for roughing it at my age. <BR><BR>But I just smile and go and pick up another email from Kiri, the doctor from Turkey or Lee, the journalist from Japan or Mary the artist from Dublin or Jamie, the meterological physicist from Peru...how else would I have made such wonderful contacts at my age-I have been invited to 5 weddings and have not one but two babies named after me!

Uncle Sam May 6th, 2002 12:39 PM

Lynn, because of your self-confidence and strong inner spirit you live life to the fullest.<BR><BR>You're truly a remarkable person.

Because that's vy May 6th, 2002 12:52 PM

Lynn, wow, or should I say, vow, how exciting to read your post! You give me hope, I have the old mindset that people will ignore me as an eccentric if I travel alone. You have given me a new perspective. I admire you, too.

pam May 6th, 2002 12:54 PM

My first trip abroad was solo and it was last summer. Circumstances for a couple of years did not allow my husband and I to travel together at the same time and I thought that if I didn't go alone, I might never get to go at all.<BR>Travelling solo was quite an experience for me. I met people from all over the world and found that I was more prepared than I thought for travelling alone. I arranged alot of the trip in advance and had some wonderful tour guides in Italy and met some terrific people through them and so I didn't feel alone. Being able to plan my time and see and do exactly what I wanted was quite wonderful. It was also wonderful to see my entire family waiting for me at the airport upon my return. The only thing I didn't absolutely love about travelling solo was eating alone. This was very difficult for me. I was asked to join another woman travelling solo one night for dinner and that was wonderful. She left the following morning and then I decided to "re-arrange" my customary sit-down dinners for dinners of a less formal nature. <BR>Travelling solo was an experience born out of necessity for me, but one which I learned was a true gift.

Mina May 6th, 2002 12:55 PM

Lynn, great post. Fantastic to know I've got years of solo travel left to look forward to...and be able to meet many kindred spirits in the process.

mark May 6th, 2002 01:01 PM

I prefer traveling solo for numerous reasons. One specifically is that my job demands a lot of interaction with editors and writers - debating, haggeling, compromising, etc, etc. Add to that the pressure of meeting weekly deadlines and the last thing I want to do on a vacation is have to be in "work mode". I did meet a friend in Rome last year which worked out great but I also spent time in Budapest alone. Vacation for me is about rejuvenation. <BR><BR>If I waited around for my friends to get it together so as to go I would probably be 65 years old - as it is we can hardly schedule getting together for dinner or a movie. <BR><BR>Another friend who had expressed interest in going to Prague with me has suddenly disappeared when time to purchase tickets and make hotel reservations - which has made me vow to never plan anything with this person again. I work to make things as simple and uncomplicated as possible - it seems to be easier traveling solo.

Lorie May 6th, 2002 01:03 PM

Did both, travel alone and with companion, male and female. <BR>Alone was okay, I got to do what I wanted, no schedule, no consultation about where to go and what to do, truly independent. <BR>With girl friend was also okay. However, make sure is not yours and hers same time of the month, hell can descend on earth without notice or warning and you can kiss you vacation goodbye. With boyfriend was the best! someone to share a romantic dinner, someone to share a passionate night in Paris or Rome, someone to travel the long road. I am a little skeptical about these ladies telling us how much they enjoyed being alone, eating alone, sleeping alone, walking the streets alone....

Ellen May 6th, 2002 01:08 PM

I learned to enjoy independent travel when I used to travel for work, and would occasionally be out of town over a weekend. I missed the kids, but it was SO nice to not be responsible for anyone's needs and preferences but my own!<BR><BR>Now, I prefer to travel solo unless I can find a companion whose travel style and preferences are similar to my own.

Vita May 6th, 2002 01:11 PM

Count me in as another woman who prefers travelling alone. I find it very liberating and I've met very interesting people. I've taken three trips abroad so far, only one of which I took alone and I definitely had the most fun on the solo trip. I'll be doing another solo trip to London in a couple of weeks.

Lane May 6th, 2002 01:31 PM

This is an interesting thread. I don't think anyone in my family has ever chosen to travel alone. They would rather forego the trip or complain that they can't travel because of no suitable companion. It must be so freeing to be able to state that you would travel overseas alone and then enjoy it while you are there. My hat's off to you all. I am still working up the nerve myself.


All times are GMT -8. The time now is 08:46 AM.