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-   -   Do the Italian men really bother a single woman? (https://www.fodors.com/community/europe/do-the-italian-men-really-bother-a-single-woman-621718/)

WillTravel Jun 8th, 2006 06:50 AM

I didn't have any problems in Italy, but have had a tiny bit of trouble in other countries. I don't know if visiting in winter (which I did in Italy) vs. summer (in other European countries) makes any difference.

I was at a local coffeeshop run by an Italian proprietor. He features this photograph prominently in his shop. It's titled American Girl in Italy in 1951, and features a young woman walking down the street as approximately ten men stop what they are doing to stare at her and ogle. I looked it up, and I see it's a classic photo. However, I really doubt anything this extreme happens much anymore.
http://tinyurl.com/knuj2

Catbert Jun 8th, 2006 06:58 AM

This is a funny thread. Isn't this essentially the same thing that happens when you walk by a crew of construction workers in the US? Particularly in NYC? Just ignore them. If you want to scare them, answer! It's just a game.

kenderina Jun 8th, 2006 07:08 AM

No, I don't think it happens anymore :) Then, a girl from outside Italy (no matter from where) was rather exotic. People didn't travel too much as we do now.
I really think the italian men are funny :) They don't mean to be bothering, just want to know girls..if you ignore them..they go to know one another LOL
A lot of them come to Spain in holidays just for that matter. We, the women, use to say that they want just the same as the spanish men..but while they are trying , they're a lot funnier than the spaniards LOL
You can always ignore them, and usually they respect that.
As lobo said, the "touching" thing is a cultural clash for you, we spaniards, in general, are very touching also.

lobo_mau Jun 8th, 2006 07:19 AM

The "marry me" thing is a compliment. It's probably the last thing they are thinking of...

ilovetotravel29 Jun 8th, 2006 07:28 AM

No. Or at least they didn't bother me.

I did have a guy touch my shoulder, but only perhaps because he thought I was interested in a carriage ride---I was petting the horse in the carriage. It was a cute horse, but I couldn't justify the ride.....I feel bad for the horses..... :(

FainaAgain Jun 8th, 2006 07:45 AM

Catbert, I wonder if there will be any constructions in Chicago on September 12-16 when I'll be visiting :-?

marti1 Jun 8th, 2006 08:21 AM

After many trips to Italy, never had a problem , just smile and keep walking... or ignore them... which ever you like.
But remember a smile does'nt kill anyone and that's what local women do
so if they think you're local they won't bug you.
For me it's a pleasure to hear them calling me bella! it makes you feel good.-

Citylghts Jun 8th, 2006 08:26 AM

Faina, if you're really looking, probably the largest right now is the Trump Tower right downtown. ;-)

This always reminds me of a scene in the movie "Garbo Talks" where Anne Bancroft dresses-down a group of construction workers who are taunting and oogling a younger woman. She stops and says, "What would your mother say about wanting to ...?" And the workers all turn around sheepishly and go back to work. Maybe that's why I had a crush on Anne before I ever saw The Graduate.

Robespierre Jun 8th, 2006 08:44 AM

Hmmm. They're annoyed when we ogle and whistle, and they're annoyed when we don't any more.

Anyone see a pattern developing here?

lobo_mau Jun 8th, 2006 08:51 AM

I stop trying to understand women many centuries again...

kenderina Jun 8th, 2006 08:57 AM

Oh, you don't have to understand women..just love us !! :)

Poohgirl Jun 8th, 2006 09:00 AM

Since many Italian men live at home longer than we do, if a guy proposes and you want to get rid of him you might say "I don't know how to cook or clean." :D

lobo_mau Jun 8th, 2006 09:01 AM

kenderina, I fully agree with you ;-)

kenderina Jun 8th, 2006 09:01 AM

Very good, Poohgirl !!! :))

PalQ Jun 8th, 2006 09:11 AM

Why are younger Italian men so juvenile - that's the question...and it extends to their driving habits and mopeds the terrorize narrow city streets.
On a night train once i saw the quickest an American girl was seduced by the Italian charm. In a couchette and the young american college girl on a backpacking trip started talking to a young Italian guy and a few minutes later they disappeared only to about 15 minutes later seen coming out of the WC together. This girl must have set a world record for falling for an Italian giggolo - it was about 30 minutes after the train left Nice for Rome. Point: some women may revel in the attention but for most its unwanted attention. Never really threatening but harassment nevertheless. and i don't think it's a stereotyping thing as i've traveled for years in Italy and see (heard) many catcalls and whistles from young Italian men towards young women. So juvenile and i often wonder why?

Underhill Jun 8th, 2006 09:18 AM

On our first trip to Roma I got painfully pinched on a bus. After that I made my huband stand behind me!

PalQ Jun 8th, 2006 09:20 AM

Funny how now in the U.S. such a pinch on the bum would result in criminal sexual charges and the perpetrator being put on the sex criminal list probably for life, but in Italy is just passes for fun.
I believe President Berlosconi actually pinched some ladies behind during the recent election and it was laughed off.

kenderina Jun 8th, 2006 09:27 AM

My male friend Emilio has been pinched at the bum in the Metro (by women) here in Spain so..that's not only italian, only happens often there :) Not sexual harassment(in most cases)..just very bad manners.

shortcake05479 Jun 8th, 2006 10:03 AM

Totally agree...if some guy at a bar in the states grabbed my butt, he'd be thrown out the door within minutes!

But that's why I like to travel (Not for the bum pinching, but the cultural differences lol)

Mathieu Jun 8th, 2006 10:25 AM


Ahhh, you ladies take the fun out of everything for us romantic men !
You may pinch me anytime you like. (and I don't mean to wake me from dreaming !)


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