Do italian girls like american guys?

Oct 13th, 2005, 08:53 AM
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Yeah, but that advice about cooking is SO right on. If only young men knew how much a woman appreciates a man who can cook!

(Hi NYC!)
Marilyn is offline  
Oct 13th, 2005, 08:58 AM
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I will tell you last time I was in Italy a couple of years ago, I met a very attractive American guy who was on vacation with his buddy (around mid to late 20's). They both speak fluent Italian. They told me they were at a disco trying to talk to girls and the girls wouldn't give them the time of day. After they just felt forget this garbage and started speaking to each other in english/american accents, they said the girls immediately changed their minds and starting to swarm around them. Having been to Italy a few times and having dated an Italian (or maybe two!), I can tell you there is a lot of truth to the stereotype of the grown Italian man living at home with his mother who wouldn't know how to cook or wash his clothes if his life depended on it. I do remember thinking after the novelty wore off, how do these young Italian women deal with this. American men were't looking so bad now
Dori is offline  
Oct 13th, 2005, 09:29 AM
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As the den mother to a college full of (mainly) North American college-age young people in Italy, I can honestly say that Italian women seem much less likely to find North American men attractive than the other way round.

Our young women (please, Johnt3psu, lose the reference to "girls"!)seemed to have little difficulty in finding young men to date, the young men were a lot less likely to find dates for clubs, dinners out and so forth.

I present the facts only and won't speculate on why...though having watched these folks for some time, I have some theories.
LJ is offline  
Oct 13th, 2005, 09:42 AM
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NYTS, I suggest you read my post again. It was not MY take--it was the take of my Italian female colleagues. And THEY all live independently. Why is it that these women are able to make it on their own but the men their own age can't? (And most of the the women earn less than the men!)
BTilke is offline  
Oct 13th, 2005, 10:25 AM
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Simple, BTilke, women are more motivated and are the superior gender. We're genetically predisposed with genes that want to take care of the world, especially are men.
NYCTravelSnob is offline  
Oct 13th, 2005, 10:41 AM
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It appears john is a college student, and so is probably referring to other students -- although maybe just around his age. I think you are giving him a hard time about the girls term thing and it isn't offensive to very many females at that age. It would certainly be inappropriate if a guy was asking about women in their 40s, for example, but I don't know of any college-age "women" who object to being called girls and they use the term themselves. My nieces who are just a little older don't sit around talking about who's dating which "woman". I am not by any means traditional or conservative on this, just think this PC stuff is a little out of hand.

Now I went to a doctor once who referred to me as a "girl" when I was about 48, and I didn't like that at all, but I didn't object when I was 20.
Christina is offline  
Oct 13th, 2005, 10:43 AM
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LOL Ira.

Just give me the chocolate.

jules4je7 is offline  
Oct 13th, 2005, 10:50 AM
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Hey, my female friends and I, all professional women in our late 50s, still enjoy 'girls' night out' and our nickname is 'the fun girls'. It doesn't shake my self-assurance to be referred to as a girl in that light-hearted way. And if my husband told me he was going out to play golf with THE MEN, instead of the guys, I'd fall down laughing. In fact, he sometimes plays poker with THE BOYS!
hdm is offline  
Oct 13th, 2005, 02:10 PM
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Yeah sorry about the late response, thanks everybody for helping me out. Im 20 and I am learning italian, I have enough of it to get by, but I want to be able to carry out a decent conversation. I can fall into the cute category but probably not the hot category. NYC Travel snob I probably look german, between 6'1'' and 6'2'' and have dark blonde hair and blue eyes. My mom will be on the other side of the world and I will be living in an apartment with some roomates. Ill get back with the other responses, thanks for the help.
johnt3psu is offline  
Oct 13th, 2005, 02:55 PM
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Hello johnt, young Italian women (note I did NOT use the term girls) these days are very serious about getting an education and then a good job so that they will be economically in good shape. They do not want to become "just wives and the keeper of the house". The birthrate in Italy is, I believe, the lowest in the world as the average Italian woman is not too interested in having more than one baby, if that.

Now, you are not looking for someone to marry or have a baby with I assume.

You are asking (I will take your question at face vaule) if Italian young women like American young men. From everything I know yes they do IF the American young man has decent manners, is interesting, can hold a good conversation and respects their life dreams (getting a good education and then a good job).

Than of course there is the other side of the coin. The young Italian woman who does not have the chance to further her education, to get a good job. That type of young woman would no doubt be interested in a lot of young American men if she thought that the relationship would get her out of her lifestyle. Not much different then anywhere else in the world.

I would say though that from all of the Italians I know that generally speaking young Italian woman are very independent. She is also pretty intelligent and street smart and can readily distinguish between a "player" and a sincere fellow.

Also keep in mind that the typical young woman of Italy is also aware of her parents and family's expectations. Marry well, hopefully to another Italian, and to a Catholic. Never mind if no one ever goes to mass LOL.

Best wishes to you.
LoveItaly is offline  
Oct 13th, 2005, 04:01 PM
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I am just looking at dating somebody not something really serious like marrying someone.
johnt3psu is offline  
Oct 13th, 2005, 04:04 PM
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Hi john, I would imagine if you are sincere, well mannered and can hold an interesting conversation you will not have any problem dating an Italian young woman. Best wishes to you!!
LoveItaly is offline  
Oct 13th, 2005, 04:12 PM
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johnt3psu is offline  
Oct 16th, 2005, 09:22 PM
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Even though you have, as you say, dated some Italian men, I have to disagree with your claim;

"I can tell you there is a lot of truth to the stereotype of the grown Italian man living at home with his mother who wouldn't know how to cook ..... if his life depended on it.

This is most definitely not the case, in my experience. I have eaten a number of wonderful meals cooked by Italian men, both here and in Italy, and I'm always very impressed that so many of them are such excellent cooks!

Just last night I enjoyed dinner with an Italian family, and the 35 year old son made the pasta course (perfectly done) as well as an excellent Tiramisu for desert. Maybe you dated a couple of men who didn't cook for you during the date, but believe me, a large percentage of Italian men know how to cook very well! And since I have enjoyed eating the results a few times, I am jumping to their defense!!

John3psu-you sound very much like a nice-looking and sincere young man who will not have a problem being accepted by many Italian girls.

Many young Italian women are just as likely to be interested to meet and get to know young American guys as you are to get to know them. Just be yourself, and treat them well, you'll be fine!

Many of us here are much, much older than 20 so it's a good idea to filter the responses a bit.

bellastar is offline  
Oct 16th, 2005, 09:54 PM
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Why would Italian girls/women be any different to American girls/women?

My daughter is 23 and is simply looking for a nice chap with a good sense of humour who she can connect with!

My 22 yr old will probably move back to the UK next year, she moved to the US but met her boyfriend on a quick trip to England with her girlfriends for last New Year.

Did she meet boys in the US? Did she connect with them?

john3psu, If I was you I'd practise my Italian - conversation is the only way to connect with someone. I think Walkinaround and Cassandra have it figured out

Good Luck!
alya is offline  
Oct 17th, 2005, 12:20 AM
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It's so easy to find where the younger people hang out. Just check out the crowds of people smoking in front of a pub/bar/restaurant. If you find a crowd your age, then you are in the right place!
kleeblatt is offline  
Oct 17th, 2005, 05:41 AM
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Everybody knows its all in the shoes you wear.
Italian chicks are hot.
GalavantingReprobate is offline  
Oct 17th, 2005, 07:25 AM
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"but believe me, a large percentage of Italian men know how to cook very well!'

Right, and the Pope isn't Catholic!
degas is offline  
Oct 17th, 2005, 08:41 AM
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Have we all forgotten what Italians look like? Have none of you seen a blonde/blue Italian? I agree, the stereotype is dark/dark.

I'm just curious if johnt3psu gets any action in his hometown by beginning sentences with "Yeah". I am pretty sure that's the correct spelling of a lazy American "yes".
Oct 19th, 2005, 12:21 PM
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"I think BTilke's take is a little off. The housing crisis in the city-centers is a much bigger cause than being a momma's boy."

Both are true. Many Italian young people don't leave home because they can't afford it, many because it's awfully cushy to have mamma do everything. Many Italian marriages have foundered on an oppressively present mother-in-law, especially when, as often happens, the young couple move out... to another apartment in the same building! Mamma would be offended if she didn't have the keys and couldn't just pop in to inspect whenever she felt like it!

Of course there are many cases where this works out fine, but the stereotype has value.

My daughter was just telling me that she wrote an essay in school today about "problems of today's youth" and concluded that they don't know how to entertain themselves because they get everything handed to them on a silver platter!

John, at least you're asking questions - that's an important start. Do the same with the girls you meet; you'll learn lots of Italian that way (and/or they'll learn lots of English) and getting her to talk about herself is a sure-fire way to get her to think you're wonderful - men who LISTEN are rare in either culture.

The advice about dressing well is good, so try this: pick a girl you want to get to know, and ask her to help you shop for clothing. Many would be quite pleased to help a 6-foot blue-eyed blond choose the right clothing to suit him! (Uh - just be prepared for this to be quite expensive...)

As for women vs. girls: everyone in Italy is a "giovane" (youth) or ragazzo or ragazza until they're at least 30. I never seen a newspaper story refer to anyone under 30 as a donna or uomo. So John is already in the groove by referring to his female peers as ragazze!

best regards,
Deirdré Straughan (personal) (work)
DeirdreStraughan is offline  

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