Why not agree to tag-team childcare duties - seems better than not going at all. Maybe once you get there you will find a nonna.

Hi Zeppole-- I know what you mean-- I feel like I'm only getting half (or possibly one-eighth) of the story with this event! To go or not to go, that is the question. We've been dreaming of this trip to bella Capri for months...they're offering to fly us over and put us up at this gorgeous place-- yet they seem panicked about finding a nonna?

Ann-- I know, I couldn't believe it when I saw their rates! But everyone's being so weird, I wonder who exactly is getting paid what?

Sue-- yep, I think of that as our hope-for-the-best/prepare-for-the-worst approach. And like you say, at least we'll get to go....

I don't know what capacity they expect of you, but if they don't expect much of you I would just go with the baby and enjoy the trip. My husband used to get great business trips, also. Now he's retired so traveling is on us. When my daughter was young or off school we used to go on these fabulous trips and do our own thing. Even if you have to miss some dinners, it's worth the free trip and a stay in the Capri Palace (literally Palace). My daughter and I met some wonderful people at the pools. We have wonderful memories of those times. We had more fun than my husband. Happily, now he is enjoying traveling more.

Ann1, believe what you will for whatever if it makes you feel good, but the Capri Tourism Board -- which Zerlina seems to have some faith in -- lists the Capri Palace as offering babysitting services.

http://www.capritourism.com/imgg/dow...turismo_09.pdf

Dianaa,

I'm not sure why anybody is "believing" anybody about anything having to do with children or babysitters at the Capri Palace. If you pick up the phone and call, you don't have to say who you are or when you plan to be there or with whom. Just ask them if the desk if the hotel offers babysitting for a child your age. If they don't allow children on the property, or babysitting for kids 15 months old, I'm sure they'll tell you, in English.

I think I would believe the hotel itself rather than Capri Tourism or any other website. I have found many times that associated websites are wrong.

Best thing to do as zeppole mentioned is speak to the hotel itself anonymously and not take the word of various websites.

Dear Friends,
Well, I guess I'm going to chalk this up to the old adage: If something seems too good to be true, it probably is.

The Naples Chamber of Commerce supposedly offered to fly us all out to participate in a literary festival (I'm a writer) that would include my books as well as those of others. They seemed to be gloriously welcoming and when I mentioned we'd want to have help with childcare assured us it wouldn't be a problem. Last week, a month and a half before the event, they seemed to panic about our child, and this morning they sent us a list of dictums including statements like "the child can not take part in any event, tour, lunch, or dinner," and "the organizers are in no way involved, liable, or responsible for your problems with babysitting."

Of course we understand that some events simply aren't for kids, but for months they clearly encouraged us to bring her. I'm amazed at how quickly one can go from feeling like an honored guest to a party-crasher!

Sadly, we've decided that we'll be declining this invitation, such as it is, after all. But I have to thank all of you for your warm and wise guidance--it's been so appreciated. For now, we'll be working on a plan B May get-away instead.

PS--and if anyone knows any nice, kid-friendly hotels in NYC, please let me know!

Wow, I'm sorry. That really is unfriendly. Maybe a lot of people were asking the same question and they panicked.

I'm not sure what you mean by kid-friendly hotels in NYC. Do you mean being able to get a sitter? There are so many hotels in NYC that are accommodating that way. The only thing I say is be careful and make sure they speak English so your child doesn't have problem with them. What price range were you thinking of? What area of NYC were you thinking of?

Hi Ann,

I was so sad to turn down the trip, but now I almost feel relieved not to have to wrangle with it any more.

For NYC-- we're open to almost any part of Manhattan--we prefer below mid-town, but we're hoping to find something for under $200/a day, so no restrictions on locale. A hotel that provides childcare would be a dream!

The price is the tough thing. The Wolcott on 31st Street between 5th and Broadway (that's where Broadway cuts across) is good and under $200. The Carvi hotel is $209. I'm not sure about babysitting with these hotels but you can ask. The Carvi is in Midtown (on 55th between 3rd and Lexington) but on the east side. The Wolcott is lower midtown. I don't know about hotels in Soho or Tribeca.

Although you've decided not to go, and completely off the babysitting topic, does your daughter have a passport?

Ooh, Ann-- I'll definitely check into both these places-- many thanks!

Jean-- yes, we got our daughter a passport-- paid a nice big fee to expedite it in time for the trip no less. Sigh.

I'm thinking that you might assume this time in your life is "with baby in tow" and just look forward to those adult-oriented trips for when she's more self-sufficient.