Question for Emily (Post, that is!)
 

`When on cruises, my husband buys a package deal where you get different wine (or a choice) each night with dinner. Invariably, after it is opened, we share it with table mates (funny, they never order a bottle), and this annoys me after a while. Shouldn't they at least alternate with us when buying and sharing the wine? What is proper???

Miss Manners says you should share- and then they should get a bottle the next nite and so on----You should NOT be expected to pay for a full table full of wine on a nightly basis.

You should read my posting about sharing wine with tablemates. Many people have been fake posting calling themselves Yoda, but I am the one who posted the other thing.<BR><BR>Do not EXPECT tablemates to buy wine for you. You should specifically discuss whether everyone at the table wants to take turns buying wine. Some people do not drink at all. Others cannot afford it (but might feel obligated to drink your wine if you offer it to them). Do not expect reciprocation without discussing it.

Yoda, when the waiter comes around the first time,the polite thing to do is ask him to remove your wine glass if you don't drink. Just leaving it there, and saying "don't mind if I do" when offered other peoples is not nice. At the very least, they should reciprocate.

You should not only discuss wine reciprocation, but also put it in writing to ensure the other parties do not default on their obligations. And when you write your Wine Reciprocation Treaty, be sure to specify that the other's wines will be of equivalent or greater quality than yours. You may also want to put the said wines in escrow just to be sure they actually exist.