The Scruffman Chronicles: The Scruffman in India and Nepal
Jul 13th, 2010, 05:59 PM
#201
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<i> 'The Scruffman has been back in the Netherlands since early May.'</i>
According to my calendar it is now mid July.
If this self-involved child is too stupid to observe the simplest of health precautions and prevent himself from getting ill in India and too stupid to go to a doctor in Holland for ten - yes, <i>ten</i> weeks - I'm wondering just when our sympathy is meant to run out.
Mine certainly has.
According to my calendar it is now mid July.
If this self-involved child is too stupid to observe the simplest of health precautions and prevent himself from getting ill in India and too stupid to go to a doctor in Holland for ten - yes, <i>ten</i> weeks - I'm wondering just when our sympathy is meant to run out.
Mine certainly has.
Jul 13th, 2010, 06:50 PM
#203
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Well, I've been trying to keep my lip zipped. Today, I failed.
There are many ways to read the Scruffman narrative. Those of us who have spent a long time in India interpret this lad's behavior in an entirely different way than his loving and long-suffering mother and the crowd of naive Europhiles following his ludicrous exploits with bated breath. I suppose now I'll be abused for pointing out the obvious.
There are many ways to read the Scruffman narrative. Those of us who have spent a long time in India interpret this lad's behavior in an entirely different way than his loving and long-suffering mother and the crowd of naive Europhiles following his ludicrous exploits with bated breath. I suppose now I'll be abused for pointing out the obvious.
Jul 13th, 2010, 07:30 PM
#204
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I'm not the one who woke this thread up. I'm over on the Europe board to avoid boring and/or upsetting the several people here who don't care for the story and can't resist telling me so. But I will point out, no one is making you read it. So what exactly is your point? It's like the people who feel a need to announce that they visited Rome, hated it, and will never go again. Why should anyone else care whether they go again or not? If you don't want to, then don't. No need to announce it.
That's not intended as abuse, BTW. I just don't understand why you are reading if you think my son is a waste of space, and since you've long ago made clear what you think of him, what is the point of repeating it? Do you think I didn't understand you the first time?
That's not intended as abuse, BTW. I just don't understand why you are reading if you think my son is a waste of space, and since you've long ago made clear what you think of him, what is the point of repeating it? Do you think I didn't understand you the first time?
Jul 13th, 2010, 08:00 PM
#205
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Yes, it's all my fault.
As you fail to recognise that you are actually enabling his behavior, as you relentlessly romanticise his failings in this interminable self-help thread, as <i>he</i> fails to recognise that there are consequences to stupidity, that living off the kindness of others is simply parasitic, that there is nothing smart, adventuorous or remotely intelligent about his so-called adventure to the feral tourist ghettos of India I guess you two are trapped in a never-ending fantasy.
Yes, it's all my fault for reading it. I forgot that only gormless praise was required.
What began as a comedy is now just a bit tragic. Wise up, arts. Don't shoot the messenger. I'm not the guy you should be screeching at.
As you fail to recognise that you are actually enabling his behavior, as you relentlessly romanticise his failings in this interminable self-help thread, as <i>he</i> fails to recognise that there are consequences to stupidity, that living off the kindness of others is simply parasitic, that there is nothing smart, adventuorous or remotely intelligent about his so-called adventure to the feral tourist ghettos of India I guess you two are trapped in a never-ending fantasy.
Yes, it's all my fault for reading it. I forgot that only gormless praise was required.
What began as a comedy is now just a bit tragic. Wise up, arts. Don't shoot the messenger. I'm not the guy you should be screeching at.
Jul 13th, 2010, 08:41 PM
#206
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I'm not screeching at you, dogster. Maybe a little paranoia on your part? And I <i>am</i> screeching in another direction.
>>Yes, it's all my fault for reading it. I forgot that only gormless praise was required.<<
My 82-year-old mother says this kind of passive-aggressive, manipulative, um, stuff. It doesn't do you credit and it isn't attractive. You're a very intelligent man. That's not what I said, and you know it quite well.
I'm not sure what you think I should have done or should be doing that I'm not, other than not write about it. I guess I should not have wired him (his own) money and arranged to get him ATM cards? And exactly how was he supposed to get home without access to his money? Other than that, I'm not sure how I am "enabling" him. He's 22 and has control of his own money, so my influence and control is pretty limited. Other than that brief patch in India he has not otherwise required my assistance over the 10 months he's been gone.
Can't see the self-help angle. I have asked for advice on a couple issues, but that just makes me one of the gazillion people who come to these forums for just that purpose, and that's why the forums are here. Oh wait, not the sort of questions I am supposed to ask, apparently. I am not asking for consolation or support from <i>anyone</i> here. I am sharing the story because there are people who are interested in it (apparently even you since you keep coming back), and I have asked for information. That's it.
It's too bad for you that his experience of India didn't live up to your standards. I notice you're not whinging on about Nepal any more, apparently because he didn't spend any of his time there at the druggie hotel as you had predicted he would, so I guess at least that part doesn't require your contempt. But I think you fail to recognize that you are imposing your own standards of what is the appropriate way to visit to India, the appropriate kinds of experiences to have there, whatever. But he's not having <i>your</i> trip, which would also be informed by your many years of life and travel experience. He's having <i>his</i> trip. No doubt he has learned a whole darn lot, and he's not done learning it since he's playing with his health right now.
I'm not "shooting the messenger." (Really that's kind of arrogant, don't you think?) I just don't understand why the messenger keeps coming back and saying the same thing, when I've already heard the message.
Anyway, I would bow to your superior wisdom (actually I don't mean this particularly sarcastically, whatever it sounds like), if only I knew what the heck it is you want me to do to convince you that I think you are the authority.
I will add, however, in a spirit of helpfulness, that if you don't keep posting on it, this thread will sink back into the bowels of the forum, my son and I will vanish from your consciousness, and the story won't disturb, offend, or annoy you again.
>>Yes, it's all my fault for reading it. I forgot that only gormless praise was required.<<
My 82-year-old mother says this kind of passive-aggressive, manipulative, um, stuff. It doesn't do you credit and it isn't attractive. You're a very intelligent man. That's not what I said, and you know it quite well.
I'm not sure what you think I should have done or should be doing that I'm not, other than not write about it. I guess I should not have wired him (his own) money and arranged to get him ATM cards? And exactly how was he supposed to get home without access to his money? Other than that, I'm not sure how I am "enabling" him. He's 22 and has control of his own money, so my influence and control is pretty limited. Other than that brief patch in India he has not otherwise required my assistance over the 10 months he's been gone.
Can't see the self-help angle. I have asked for advice on a couple issues, but that just makes me one of the gazillion people who come to these forums for just that purpose, and that's why the forums are here. Oh wait, not the sort of questions I am supposed to ask, apparently. I am not asking for consolation or support from <i>anyone</i> here. I am sharing the story because there are people who are interested in it (apparently even you since you keep coming back), and I have asked for information. That's it.
It's too bad for you that his experience of India didn't live up to your standards. I notice you're not whinging on about Nepal any more, apparently because he didn't spend any of his time there at the druggie hotel as you had predicted he would, so I guess at least that part doesn't require your contempt. But I think you fail to recognize that you are imposing your own standards of what is the appropriate way to visit to India, the appropriate kinds of experiences to have there, whatever. But he's not having <i>your</i> trip, which would also be informed by your many years of life and travel experience. He's having <i>his</i> trip. No doubt he has learned a whole darn lot, and he's not done learning it since he's playing with his health right now.
I'm not "shooting the messenger." (Really that's kind of arrogant, don't you think?) I just don't understand why the messenger keeps coming back and saying the same thing, when I've already heard the message.
Anyway, I would bow to your superior wisdom (actually I don't mean this particularly sarcastically, whatever it sounds like), if only I knew what the heck it is you want me to do to convince you that I think you are the authority.
I will add, however, in a spirit of helpfulness, that if you don't keep posting on it, this thread will sink back into the bowels of the forum, my son and I will vanish from your consciousness, and the story won't disturb, offend, or annoy you again.
Jul 13th, 2010, 10:34 PM
#207
I hesitate to post seeing I will keep the thread alive, but I agree with artsnletters comments. I for one am very grateful that Arts has posted Scruffman's adventures, it's exactly the sort of thing that should be posted on this forum. It's been a fascinating story and most parents would have done exactly what Arts has done to help their child if they requested it. I know my son would never have had the confidence to do a trip like this, my daughter maybe, but her big adventure is moving from New Zealand to live in New York City.
Sep 5th, 2010, 07:11 AM
#208
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OK... After reading through the entire saga, all I can say is that I am envious of all that the Scruffman has accomplished on this little junket of his.
Being a friend of Artsnletters for some years now, as well as having an acquaintance with the Scruffman since his teens, this has been a read of some personal interest, as well as a very good insight of the person I have watched grow from his teens into a truly amazing adult. I wish that a lot more of our children would grow into equally engaging adults who are not afraid to take life by the horns and see things that deal more with humanity, rather than tourist bureaus!
Artsnletters is a truly amazing individual in her own rights and it is quite obvious that Scruffman is an apple that did not fall too far from the tree.
Still waiting, with bated breath, for the end of the saga and the Scruffman's return home. In the meantime, I'm hoping for all the best.
Being a friend of Artsnletters for some years now, as well as having an acquaintance with the Scruffman since his teens, this has been a read of some personal interest, as well as a very good insight of the person I have watched grow from his teens into a truly amazing adult. I wish that a lot more of our children would grow into equally engaging adults who are not afraid to take life by the horns and see things that deal more with humanity, rather than tourist bureaus!
Artsnletters is a truly amazing individual in her own rights and it is quite obvious that Scruffman is an apple that did not fall too far from the tree.
Still waiting, with bated breath, for the end of the saga and the Scruffman's return home. In the meantime, I'm hoping for all the best.
Sep 5th, 2010, 08:35 AM
#209
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Folks, I'm trying to let this thread die. Please continue any discussions on the new thread:
http://www.fodors.com/community/euro...-to-europe.cfm
(Surprised to see you here, Joanie, and wowed and kinda embarrassed to read your praise. Thanks!)
http://www.fodors.com/community/euro...-to-europe.cfm
(Surprised to see you here, Joanie, and wowed and kinda embarrassed to read your praise. Thanks!)
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