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-   -   marriage proposal help (https://www.fodors.com/community/asia/marriage-proposal-help-674042/)

tonguetied Jan 26th, 2007 01:44 PM

marriage proposal help
 
I am travelling to Shenzhen in February and asking my girlfriends family permission to ask for her hand in marriage. Are there any Chinese customs i should know about when i speak with her parents for their permission?

rkkwan Jan 26th, 2007 01:53 PM

People still do that? ;)

Shanghainese Jan 26th, 2007 03:14 PM

rkkwan: Do you suggest eloping?

tonguetied: Residents in Shenzhen are quite forward thinking, I am sure they will be thrilled to have you as a new family member and not mind your un-chinese manners. What does your girlfriend think? Can't wait for a TR!

Kathie Jan 26th, 2007 03:46 PM

I know Chinese (and Japanese) families living in the US where it would be expected that a suitor would ask for the parents permission, so I'm sure it is an expected formality.

Sorry, I don't know enough about the customs to give you any guidance, but I expect someone on the board will know.

I, too, will look forward to your trip report.

kuranosuke Jan 27th, 2007 05:21 AM

tonguetied, good for you. you will score a thousand points with your future in-laws.:-)

tonguetied Jan 27th, 2007 06:33 PM

Thanks for everyone's feedback. Yes, though it is hard to believe, people still would like to include future in-laws in proposing to their daughter :).

The real reason i posted this topic is because i have read so much regarding Chinese wedding customs and would like to know if there are also Chinese proposal customs that i need to consider when i travel to Shenzhen to meet her parents. My girlfriend is actually a very modern woman, but her parents are not.

Wish me luck :-). I will report back when i return in March.

cmenoni Jan 27th, 2007 09:33 PM

Why don't you ask HER??!!


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