i really appreciate everyone's input. we can't cut tokyo because we arrive at 4:40 pm and the last flight to bkk leaves at 6:35. ccc, my kids like yours will not be thrilled with lots of sightseeing. we just came from a dinner party where someone said to bag our most recent idea because of the coup. instead they suggested flying to hanoi, taking the reunification express down to a vn beach, then flying back to tokyo from saigon.
so many choices....

what airline are you flying? Assuming you are from the US? You can likely connect right to BKK...I'm 100% sure you can on NWA and United. Connecting in Narita is easy. If you get your flights issued as one ticket rather than ticketing them seperately, even if you misconnect then you'll still get there without having to pay twice. If I were flying to BKK via Tokyo I'd just connect and get it over with rather than stop. It's a long trip no matter how you do it. Stopping just makes it longer I think, and wastes valuable time. With 12 nights I'd get right to BKK and sleep there and start your holiday the first morning (well, second morning thanks to the international date line crossing).

Just now I see your first message saying you already have tickets to Tokyo. I'd change those tickets to get you to your final destination. Ticketing seperately from Tokyo to somewhere in Asia will cost you much more than a through ticket. If you wanted to stopover in Tokyo, you could even do that on a through ticket to wherever on most airlines and most fare classes.

Do you have award tickets maybe and couldn't get beyond Tokyo due to lack of availability?

Again only my two cents, but I think you and your children will have a much better time in some combination of Thailand, Laos, and Cambodia than in Vietnam. Nothing against Vietnam - I've been there and liked it. I just like the others more.

to kimjapan, re tickets: we somehow managed to get 4 aa business class tickets using mileage to tokyo, which is how this whole trip started. (before that we were going to go to brazil.) i don't think we can attach the next segment on the reward ticket, but will check.
to ccc: thanks...the boys don't want to do a lot of traveling around anyway, so tonight i'm going to try to narrow down our itinerary.

Excellent find with the business class tix to Tokyo. Definitely do call and see if the itinerary can be linked to tickets you purchase...I'm not sure how it would work to be honest. Maybe, just maybe, you could get them changed to be tickets to BKK. You don't lose anything by inquiring.

If you do have leave them as is, then I agree...stay the night in Narita. But then, you can fly any airline out of Narita, so get a morning flight out of Narita on Thai Air or Japan Airlines and maximize your time in Thailand.

Now that I've inadvertently started a controversy, I have a few more Qs:
It turns out we were able to get business class award tickets all the way to BKK, but we can only be there for 8 nights. (We will spend 3 nights in Tokyo on the way home; our kids, who are addicted to sushi and electronics, are thrilled.) So now we want to go to one destination besides BKK. This is what we're thinking:

3 nights - bkk
5 nights - ???elephants/waterfalls/hilltribes
1 night - redeye back to japan
3 nights - tokyo

For the 5-night stay we are considering
-Luang Prabang,
-the Anantara Golden Triangle,
-Angkor, or
-Chiang Mai (and include a trek).
My husband is also still intrigued with Vietnam...

Sorry Kathie I have to disagree with you. In my opinion I really don't consider Sage's site to be advertising (profits go to helping needy children) anymore than references to the Ponheary Ly Foundation which comes up quite often on certain posts. Actual it is quite a good site for information on Cambodia.

For 5 nights of waterfalls, elephants and hill tribes, Chiang Mai or the Anantara may suit you, and they are easy and inexpensive to get to from BKK.

Chiang Mai is much more city than where the Anantara is, right on the border. The Anantara has a 3 day mahout program that is very flexible...the reservation process can be challenging, but it did all finally work out. The good part of flexible means that you can do elephants in the early morning, then go off on the river or to a hill tribe or to Chiang Rai, then come back and do elephants. The bad part is that the Anantara is not inexpensive, and it is isolated...nowhere around to eat really other than the hotel unless you get adventurous and work around the hotel's expensive transfer to town and eat there...rent a car or negotiate a songthaew ride. The bonus over elephant camp in Lampang is that you get comfy beds, pool and ac.

If you are in Chiang Mai, you are close to lots of choices of hotels, restaurants, shopping, and sightseeing is easy to manage. The Elephant Conservation Center is great...we went in December...but rustic. Hard lumpy beds, thatched hut, no ac (cold in December though), no TV, no pool, delicious home cooked food though. At the time we went, the price was 4000 baht per person. Now the price is listed at 8000 baht per person. To me that's expensive for such basic accommodations and food...but the elephant stuff is great. You can viist as a day trip and pay like 70 baht entrance fee and not do the program and that's fun too.

andy,

i just looked at your website and am intrigued by Mondulkiri. How much of a hassle is it to get there?

(Thanks, Andy)

Thank you for all of these posts. I am trying to put together a trip for June with my family of six and this thread has been very helpful! We have two weeks (more or less) to travel and the options are limitless!! Yikes.

highledge--I took my family of 6 to Thailand back in April and wrote a WAY TOO LONG trip report.

Consider using Cherry as a tour guide--she was wonderful. Feel free to email any specific questions.

:)

Hiledge & kdk1965, Would love to hear your recommendations. Our boys are 13 and 16. Despite all the input, we still haven't figured out what we're doing (although we have multiple reservations). We know we will be in Tokyo for 3 nights and Bkk for 2-3 and would like to spend the additonal 5 nights at just one location in either Thailand, Cambodia, Laos or possibly Vietnman. Our kids are pushing for a beach, but we are still considering Luang Prabang, Siem Reap, Chiang Mai area and the Golden Triangle area. We have been all over with the kids (many times to Latin America & Europe, plus Australia, the Cook Islands, Fiji, etc.) and are happiest when we don't move around too much and become a part of the local community.

For your 5 nights, it's a tough decision among The Golden Triangle (with the elephants on-site), Luang Prabang, and Siem Reap. Personally, I wouldn't put Chaing Mai in the same class as these other destinations. And while I loved Hanoi, it would not have the combination of activities available in the other places you are considering.