This is as real as Montauk gets: a weathered old sea captain having lunch at the bar, fishermen stopping in for an afternoon pint or quick bite, and locals sharing a laugh with friends any time of the day. Here, tucked away on a side street close to Gosman's Dock yet a world apart, the beer is cold and the food is good and as down to earth as the folks who hang out here. Weird and wacky tchotchkes and seafaring-related antiques festoon the rustic wood walls and ceiling. Outsiders are welcomed but should be aware of the "list," including: no checks, no cell phones, no strollers or screaming kids, no whining, wimps, or chickenhawks. Stick with these rules, and you'll be just fine.