In contrast to the other, more tranquil Grace Bay resorts, this energetic property has a vibrant party atmosphere, nightly entertainment, and even a flying trapeze—it caters mainly to fun-loving singles and couples. Guests still fly in from North America and Europe for the scuba diving, windsurfing, and waterskiing on the turquoise waters that border what was the area's first major resort. Rooms in the village are basic and set in small, colorful bungalows. Club Med
doesn't change the clocks during Daylight Savings Time, so they may be an hour off from the rest of the island (and the airport).
Oct 21, 2014
We have been to this property 6 times. we just came back in May of 2014 and will be going back again Oct 2014. the very first time I was at the club med was in 1994 they were the only all inclusive property on the island back then. we love Club Med because it is not too big and not too small.The staff is extremely friendly and helpful and all the people we meet there are like family. we love the food as well, specially their signature bread which
is white chocolate bread! and just an FYI...since we have been going to Club Med they have done a three renovations to the property and the rooms, and when we was in May of 2014, they had just started another round of renovations to the rooms. we have always found the rooms to be very clean comfortable and everything you need are in the rooms for you like coffee pot mini refrigerators hair dryer TV, very nice rooms for the money and for the property itself! if you are looking for a luxurious luxurious hotel this is not the place for you! the club Med property is very comfortable the perfect size, friendly and helpful staff and it has the best beach on the island, that's what makes me different from everyone else! We have made Club Med our home away from home in the Turks we love it!! there!!
Sep 6, 2013
My trip was from 08/30 thru 09/06/2013. Yes the rooms are outdated, however, I appreciated that they are eco minded, with their electricity and water. I understand that the lease is up next year and mgmt. is band-aiding in case the lease isn't renewed. The food was great, no waste except from the guests, the G.O.' were wonderful and the beach one of the best I've been too. As a single, I never felt alone or neglected and met lots of friends I hope
will last a lifetime. I upgraded my room and was very pleased, the extra money was worth it. What ever I asked for (diet coke in the mini bar) was replenished every day in as much as I wanted. I hope the lease situation gets worked out and renewed to everyone's satisfaction, that way all the naysayers will stay away and leave this place to us! I WILL definitely go back, and have already started planning an all girls trip for next spring to celebrate our 60th birthdays. How all the G.O.'s remember everyone's names and where we were from is remarkable. They are intelligent folks ready to help where ever and when ever they can. Keep up the good work, looking forward to seeing everyone in 2014!
Jun 4, 2011
You will only enjoy your trip to The Club Med in Turks and Caicos (called Turkoise) if you joyfully savor your time on the stunningly beautiful beach, and if you ignore almost everything else. If you fail to maintain this selective awareness, you will return from your trip eager to post a review with the headline “Never again!” So, coming here is tough choice, even for easy-going travellers. Here’s why: The Great, The Good and the Tolerable
The resort will pleasantly surprise any avid beach connoisseur. I’ve gone to many beaches around the world over the years, but none this good. Sadly, you won’t find any other pleasant surprises here, if you expect a 4-star luxury vacation. Some aspects of the resort do qualify as acceptable/good. You’ll find the staff here consistently friendly. The food in the main dining hall is OK, despite some scary exceptions (see below). Most of the entertainers (dancers, singers, etc.) work hard to earn your smiles and laughs. And the club manages to attract a diverse mix of guests with contagiously carefree attitudes. I met some fellow overworked New Yorkers, charmingly snooty French people, lots of Italians and some Russians, all enjoying the resort with the voracity of a starved man attacking an all-you-can-eat buffet. If you spend most of your time here on the beach and in the pool area – swimming, walking, running, practicing yoga, meditating, socializing, dining, dancing – you will enjoy every minute, and not much else will matter. The Bad and The Ugly On the other hand, as soon as you start walking towards your room, you’ll discover the resort’s disheartening dark side. The landscaping in parts resembles a construction site (e.g., dried out lawns, craggy rocks, cracked cement pavements). To reach your motel-quality accommodations, you’ll need to walk up a staircase and through a tenement-style wrap-around walkway with uneven cement flooring and unfinished wooden guardrails clearly starting to rot after years of water damage. When you enter your room, you’ll immediately wonder where and when Club Med purchased the furniture (Salvation Army? When Elvis was still alive?). You might turn to the mini bar to help you get over the shock, but there is no mini bar. Seriously. So you’ll collapse on your bed, and within seconds, you’ll feel the urge to call the front desk to find out if they’ve heard of Sleepy’s and some of the advances in mattress technology since Club Med’s founding. If you suffer from any back pain, you might get better sleep in one of the hammocks by the beach. Trying to get online will remind you of the Internet’s dial-up days and make you wish you had brought a team of IT consultants with you. (FYI – Your own wireless connection will not work here) For all these reasons, soon after settling in, you’ll lose any desire to stay in your room. That’s not a bad conclusion. If you saunter over to Sharkie’s Bar, don’t eat there. The burgers and hot dogs at Sharkie’s would mystify even the food engineers at McDonald’s and Taco Bell. In the main dining hall, most of the food is digestible, but stay away from any exotic/experimental concoctions; otherwise, you may suffer gastrointestinal symptoms whose severity can be simulated by an intra-rectal detonation of a medium-potency explosive device. In my first two days here, I learned these simple do’s and don’ts, and I stayed mostly on the beach, swimming, tanning and reading a fascinating book (Joseph Campell’s The Inner Reaches of Outer Space) to the rhythmic sound of gentle waves washing over talcum-soft sand. I also enjoyed friendly repartee with some fascinating characters. Despite these simple pleasures, it would only be fair to say that the 4-star average rating for the resort on several travel sites is objectively and indisputably wrong. Without the exquisite beach, Turkoise would be fairly rated as off-the-charts-bad, simply not fit for vacations. A Note to the Authors of Positive or Ecstatic Reviews What type of hallucinogenic did you consume during your stay here, and where can I get it? It’s one thing to focus on the good when you stay here, but for the benefit of the people considering coming here for the first time, your ratings should reflect the decrepit condition of the buildings, rooms and landscape. Understand how deeply people value their vacation time. Increasingly overworked and overstressed, people across productivity-obsessed modern societies see vacations as a cherished respite, a brief opportunity to nurture their fuller potential and see their lives as they were meant to be and could still become. Vacations are a sacred time, a modern-day Holy of Holies and Ark of the Covenant, set aside from our ordinary lives to help re-awaken the nobler impulses of our souls. When you post an overblown review, you are committing an unholy act no less egregious than tricking a rabbi into eating bacon. (See Leviticus 19:14: “placing a stumbling block before the blind”). Don’t do it. Be fair. Be truthful. A Note to Club Med Management You have lost your way and sold your soul. If the hospitality industry awarded Oscars for deceptive marketing, you’d be so qualified for the dubious honor that you should just start working on your acceptance speech. But you’re not beyond redemption. First, you should really take to heart the suggestions of many of the reviewers here and on other sites who agree that Turkoise needs a major upgrade. I’m not an architect but I think it would be most economical to tear the place down and build a real resort. Because your business model and brand have changed dramatically over the past few years, you simply cannot afford not to make this investment. The resort no longer offers carnal delights, so it should at least provide basic comforts. Otherwise, the reflexive enthusiasm of your die-hard fans will eventually and inevitably vanish, and you will lose business as vacationers increasingly become more mindful of quality and value. Until you do build a real resort here, you should market Turkoise more honestly. Your bookers and your website should stop describing Turkoise as a luxury resort, and they should certainly stop calling it a singles destination. Both claims are false by any reasonable standard. (Side note: Please fix the toilet seat in room 2127. Some of the screws are loose or missing, and the seat can slide unexpectedly. You wouldn’t want a guest to slip and fall during a bowel movement set off by your chef’s inspired creations.) A Note to Sex-seekers I feel deep empathy for your ambitions, and I can only help you by urging you to go elsewhere. Yes, this resort used to be a sex-seeker’s paradise, or so I’ve heard. Apparently that’s history. There are no more sex games here and no staff blending into the crowd to get the guests laid. In fact, this is not even a singles resort anymore. It attracts plenty of couples and people of all ages, from teenagers to octogenarians. Club Med Turkoise changed from a proudly different destination offering a unique vacation experience to a just another sub-standard resort, redeemed from sheer mediocrity by its world-class beach, great staff and a genuinely talented cast of entertainers. The club’s transformation over the past decade is sad but understandable for a publicly traded company that needs to maintain access to capital and minimize the risk of sexual harassment and personal injury lawsuits. On a related note, it was amusing to meet Club Med fanatics/veterans who tend to reminisce wistfully about the resort’s orgy era the way Marcus Aurelius -- in the movie Gladiator -- reminisces about the lost glory of Rome. Many of the veterans continue to come here regularly, perhaps to nurture their memories of the better days or to maintain their denial that their beloved Sodom and Gomorra was willed out of existence by the gods of capitalism. In any case, the recidivist visitors still wax poetic about the Club Med experience, despite the absence of substantive proof. Inflated Ratings (On other sites) This example of Pavlovian conditioning helps explain Turkoise’s vastly inflated average ratings. It probably also helps the club that some of the visitors simply don’t know better. But to create and maintain the illusion of comfort and luxury, Turkoise takes another crucial step that fuses some of the finest clichés of sleazy salesmanship. The process works in two easy steps. First, when you arrive, a cheery welcoming committee immediately showers you with attention as they introduce you to “so many great/fun/beautiful/delicious” things at the resort. Ostensibly, they are trying to help you start your vacation right. In reality, the clear intent of these group-think experiments is to put some lipstick on the pig, so to speak. If you serve a McDonald’s burger to an unsuspecting patron at a fine restaurant, and if you surround this guest with people trained to exclaim ecstatically as they pretend to savor this culinary abomination, you’ll be surprised by the dramatic increase in the perceived quality of the artery-occluding mystery meal. Second, before you depart for the airport, the head of the resort and other staff come out to see you off. With obviously pre-rehearsed comments and quips, they reiterate the essential aspects of the illusion they work hard to maintain, and they try to trick the departing guests into voicing their agreement with various Club Med falsehoods. They also explicitly and shamelessly ask guests to write positive reviews on travel sites, and they actually wait for the guests to confirm that they plan to comply with this request. I’ve seen similar tactics used in many places around the world (e.g., tourist-trap stores, car dealerships, telemarketing scripts, religious cults, strip-tease clubs, etc.). It’s always sad to see that, sometimes, the deception works. Pavlovian dogs really do start to salivate at the sound of the nutrition-free whistle. And resorts like Turkoise sometimes succeed in manufacturing high ratings on travel sites. In Conclusion We probably can’t eliminate dishonesty from the marketplace. But you can do your best to avoid rip-offs. Most importantly, never hesitate to look a smiling sleezy salesman in the eye – hold the gaze firmly and fearlessly – and tell him/her/them that the world would be a better place if he went out of business.