sassysoutherngirl

I am a 34 year old,single female that currently lives in Dallas, TX. I want to move to a place where there is greater potential to find a mate. I am looking for a place that the men are not intimidated by an independant,successful woman.I am drawn to New York City because I have many friends there and I enjoy the energy. I am drawn to Fort Lauderdale/Boca/Del Ray area because of the weather and because I love to scuba dive. I know they are opposites, but which city hosts the greater potential?

GoTravel

Where are you going to have the better quality of life? What do you do for a living?

I'd rather try and live on $60K a year in South Florida than $100K a year in NYC. I wouldn't want to live anywhere but Manhattan unless it was Brooklyn Heights, Dumbo, or Park Slope and they aren't cheap.

Tandoori_Girl

There's a very heavy streak of good old boy in Florida. I'd go for New York.

GoTravel

Thinking about it, Bed Stuy would be cool and not as expensive as the other Brooklyn neighborhoods.

sassysoutherngirl

I am in medical sales. I would live in Manhatten if I went to New York. Or possibly some of the nicer surrounding cities, like the ones you named.

CWH

I'm a New Yorker. . .who was born and raised in Ft. Lauderdale! NY winters are brutal as are Ft. Lauderdale's summers! I met my husband in NY, not Florida. True, there is a streak of the "good ole boys" in Ft. Lauderdale, as well as a hefty gay population. Gay guys are great decorators and wonderful friends, but you can't take them home at night! You can meet a good guy anywhere, you just have to be in the right place. . . and don't try so hard!
Happy hunting!

nytraveler

Well - how do you live with the weather in Dallas? If you can survive that - FL in the summer might not daunt you.

Personally - I would go for NYC - but then I hate any temps over 75 (It's way too hot for me here too- but at least the summers are relatively short).

But don't assume men in NYC aren;t intimidated by independent successful women - that's an issue everywhere - the only thing is - in NYC you're likely to run into more guys who are at least as successful as you are.

Gekko

New York, without a doubt.

If you're looking for a city where men are not intimidated by an independant, successful woman, then look no farther than NYC.

South Florida? Are you kidding? I love that area, but it's NOT what you're looking for. (And I'm a former scuba instructor who dives in FL often.)

New York, specifically Manhattan, is the obvious choice for someone in your position.

Plus there are about a zillion inexpensive, direct flights from NYC to FL every day.

Good luck!

Wayne

I'm not going to recommend one place or the other. And most of the people who will reply to your question don't have any more than a scant personal knowledge of a small area in either location you are considering. (That goes for me too)

I have worked in the business world for many years and I can say without hesitation that the men with whom I have dealt would have no qualms when meeting or relating to an independent, intelligent woman. As a matter of fact, that's the sort of woman that they prefer.

Those who have characterized one location or the other as "good ole boy" or "gay" or other such terms are simply not giving you the real facts. Some places, for instance in the South, become identified with tobacco-chewing, spittin' and cussin' country boys; others like south Miami get known for the pretty boy-girls with nice earrings and pretty painted nails. But such characterizations are superfluous. You need to make your decision based on more substantial information. Find a good friend who really knows those areas. Read their newspapers. Go and visit. Good luck.

Gekko

I have a TON of personal knowledge and experience with both locations. I live in Manhattan; I spend a lot of time in south Florida (where my girlfriend is from and where her family currently resides).

One specific complaint I hear from single professional women in FL is that what few single men there are can't handle their independence and success. One won't find that problem in Manhattan.

If Sassy has friends in NYC and is looking for a mate who'll respect & enjoy her success & independence, the choice is obvious.

suzanne

In New York you are going to find a TON more single people - most people here your age aren't married. Having some connections already (you said you have friends here) will help set you up for a good social life. Men here aren't turned off by a successful woman...in fact, that's what they'd prefer!

GoTravel

I have a little more than scant knowledge since my sister lived single in Miami Beach for six years before she got married as a successful professional.

I don't think you'll have any problems in either locations.

Ever notice some of your friends always date and some are always single? I think it is the person more than the location.

Vittrad

hm... perhaps that is my problem, I've noticed that it seems most women in Chicago in their mid-30's are married, or soon to be married

Vittrad

perhaps I need to move

snowrooster

I have a single friend who just moved away from NYC (she is also early 30's and in sales). While there she found a very active singles scene, she was a bit sickened at the huge amounts of single women looking for a "good man." She said it was very competitive and you were looked down on for not having THE best shoes, THE best bag, The best everything. She got jaded with a lot of her friends and left the city recently to go to law school.

Anyway, I think you should choose the city that you think you'll like. If you're happy that will show and attract others!

Vittrad

Good lord, I could never deal with that.

JennaJ

I live in Hoboken, a very young, yuppie town across the river. Most of the town work in Manhattan. Check out www.hobokenx.com or www.hobokeni.com Real estate is slightly cheaper than Manhattan, but not by much. There are also TONS of rentals. The town has a hopping singles scene--avg age in Hoboken is 25-35

seetheworld

JennaJ, how's on street parking in Hoboken?

Btw, I'd pick NY over FL, hands down.

OneWanderingJew

Wow, I don't know how to give a clearcut answer---and I know both these places VERY well. I grew up in NY (family is still there so I go several times/yr) and lived in S. Florida for 8yrs after graduating from college. Like you said, there are pros and cons for both places.

One thing I found about living in W. Palm Beach is though I was hanging with professional and successful people, it was a rather transient place. It seems I would make friends and a couple years later, they'd move. Some transfers, some went back to where they were from or some to try some place new. Maybe what I experienced was because I was early 20s-30 and my initial network of friends down there were from college, but that was something that I found difficult. Meeting guys wasn't incredibly hard, meeting the right guys was a bit tougher.

I don't know that I necessarily agree with GoT's comment about the girls who always date but are always single. To some degree that's true, but not always. I dated a ton but none of them were Mr. Forever. I think it's easier in a bigger city to meet the types of person you are looking for just because there are so many more opportunities available.

When I started thinking about leaving Florida, I was turning 30 and definately considered moving back to NY. I ultimately didn't in part b/c of the cost of living (I'm a teacher and you know what teachers make and what NY costs!) and because I just hate the cold.

If I made more money and could afford the lifestyle I would want living in Manhattan, I would've put up w/the yucky winters and moved back.

I ended up moving to Atlanta and it's been a great thing for me. Made incredible, lasting friendships and met my husband here



Good luck with whatever you decide.

Cira

Hi Sassy: If you are moving ONLY to have a better chance to meet a mate, then I can tell you from personal experience that in life, you never know (more later on that). I live in Florida and although I wouldn't move to the South Florida area, in general, I think if it is meant to be, you stand a quicker chance to meet someone in Florida. Having said that, I can tell you that, I know many gals in pharmaceutical sales, for example, and they have pretty much all married the Florida pharm. reps they have met. My husband lived in Iowa, and I am a life-long Floridian, FATE brought us together, who would have thunk it. Best of luck to you.