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50 States; What constitutes a "visit"?

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It is a goal of mine to visit all 50 states. To date I am in the mid-30's range, depending upon how you qualify a visit. Here are several questionable scenarios:

1) Suppose someone is on vacation in southern Colorado and they go to the 4 corners monument - placing one hand and one foot in each of the 4 states - do all four states count on the list of states they've been to?

2) Suppose someone is taking a cross country trip, can you count a state that you've driven through but never stopped in? What if they stop for gas?

3) I once got stranded in Kansas City on a flight out west. I had to stay in a hotel near the airport for one night. Does Missouri count as a state I've been to?

4) Other than my hometown airport, I've probably spent more time in the Newark airport than any other airport but I've never been outside the airport itself. Does New Jersey count?

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