lightfoot

Not meaning to stir up a morality debate, I just have good friends who allow thier 15 year old daughter to drink alcohol when they visit all inclusives in Mexico. One evening was spent cleaning her up after too many white russians!! They are not this permissive at home. I have two teens who understand that underage drinking is against the law period. What about the rest of you?

Little_Man

this probably will start a debate! I grew up in Germany, and always had a sip of my parents wine, and they never drank very much, no big deal.
I let my 17 3/4 year old son have a margarita or a beer with us at dinner in Mex. recently, though he doesn't drink at home. But we didn't stay at an AI, and so never had more than 1 drink in an evening...
I could see how teens at an all inclusive could go overboard quickly~!

JeanH

It seems to me that there is a huge difference between allowing a teen to have a glass or wine or one drink at dinner and letting them all evening at the disco. I guess the legality of it doesn't bother me as much as it just not seeming right to allow your teen to become intoxicated. Jean

Dude

I let my kids at 17 and 18 drink in extreme moderation and under our supervision in restaurants in Mexico if they want to. One thing to consider- drinking ages are set locally in Mexico and it is conceivable, although not likely, that you could run into a legal problem. In most places the law is 18.

TC

What is the mixed message being sent to these kids? "We don't allow you to become falling down drunk at home - not because its harmful - but because THE LAW won't allow us to". So in a country that doesn't think it neccessary to regulate the common sense of its citizens (maybe because they have some of their own), "its o.k - knock yourself out" (literally).

And don't even get me started on American tourist embarassing behavior in foreign countries.

caribtraveler

lightfoot: It's a culture thing and I think it's one thing to allow one drink or a sip and another to allow drunkenness. Those 2 don't even compare.
My parents (my stepdad from Belgium, my mom from Haiti) let me drink wine with other dinner guests. It was not considered wrong and it was no big deal. And by the way, it never resulted in me having a drinking problem. I still enjoy an occasional glass of wine at age 34.
My husband (an American) was never allowed to drink since it's illegal in the U.S. Well, he made up for it in college and it became a problem (He doesn't drink at all anymore).
We have a 2-year-old and you just made me realize my husband and I never discussed this. Hmm...It will be interesting to hear his opinion on it.
Long story on my part to tell you that I think when you forbid kids from doing something, you only make them want to do it.
Just my personal opinion.

Diana

I totally agree with JeanH that there is a BIG difference between a glass of wine with dinner and allowing a teen to get sloppy drunk (either supervised or not).

The message that drinking in moderation and enjoying it in a social situation at dinner is acceptable is an important lesson to imprint in a young person's mind, as they will make their own choices regarding future alcohol consumption. (Most likely without parental input.)

Tossing back too many White Russians and ralphing all over yourself is also a lesson that many people who drink have learned the hard way.

I think it is a very personal decision and is vastly influenced by the personality and responsibility level of those involved.

I guess one should do want one wants re this issue with THEIR OWN children, and not worry about others' personal business...

Little_Man

Not everything in this world is black and white, no matter how much we'd like it to be, TC.
I wonder if treating alcohol more as if it's to be enjoyed with food,in moderation, than as a forbidden fruit, might make it less likely that kids will seek it out and binge on it...
I really don't know what the right answer is...

manycruiser

I lived in Spain when I was a teenager, and drinking was not against the law. Also, it wasn't a big issue. I am American. Kids need to be able to drink in moderation, so when they are "turned loose" they use good sense.

Saying no because of the age, thing serves no purpose. Setting a good example, and teaching responsibility is much more important.

You know.......they probably drink at home when they are out with their friends.

TC

"cleaning her up after too many white russians!! They are not this permissive at home."

If they aren't this permissive at home, then why in Mexico? I hold with my orginal response - its a bad mixed message. These parents aren't teaching a responsible way to enjoy a glass of wine with dinner. They are teaching its o.k. to get stupid when you go on holiday - especially to a community not your own.

mikemo

Certifiable behavior on behalf of all involved!
M

jcf27

I was lucky enough to grow up in So. America. I started drinking wine when I was about 12. At 16 I was an exchange student in the US. When asked what I'd like to drink for dinner, I innocently said -- wine. Oh my God !!!!! Out of the sudden I became a sinner; an evil person !!! How could an 'under age' teenager drink !!!! What was next? Crucifixion?

Needless to say; many Americans have to resort to laws to guide them through life. It's a pity, but reality.

What's bexst is that none of my friend or I ever got drunk. We all knew when to stop and be responsible for our actions.

J.

drdawggy

Jcf,

I am a Norte Americano who spends a great deal of time in South America. In Argentina and other parts of the world where kids drink a glass of wine in the home growing up, there is far less subsequent abuse of alcohol than in the United States where such behavior is taboo.

This having been said, as several posters note the question here is what type of drinking do parents permit at all inclusives? Having a glas of wine with parents at dinner is one thing. Downing hard liquor at a disco is another and very different thing. The former might be called responsible parenting. The latter borders on child abuse.

Binthair

Do you let your underage children smoke when outside the U.S.? When I was in high school 25 years ago you could smoke at school. I didn't because it was obvious this was not a good decision. The drinking age was 18 then. Underage students certainly got drunk and drove cars. Peer pressure and the social setting seemed to drive this. I doubt many of of these kids would have done this alone or with their parents (unless their parents were drunkards of course!)