also we are thinking about going in sep. is that a good time?

Are you willing to rent a car and drive?

is the driving same as US? Is it fairly easy? signs in english etc?
thanks for replying

IMHO driving is easier than in the US - although faster - since driver tke the rules of hte road seriusly. they have NO patience with people who lollygag or do not follow the rules. (Try driving in the left lane and you life wil be hell.)

But, with an infant I wuold plan on 2 places to stay at most -preferably an apt so adults can stay up later and you can feed baby easily whenever necessary. You can do a day trip from each place if you want.

IMHO in one week more places than that won;t work with an infant.

And you will need a car only if you stay in the countryside. Useless in Venice or Amalfi Coast.

is the driving same as US? Is it fairly easy? signs in english etc?>>

lol, reb, the written signs are in italian, though many are of course pretty self-explanatory. and names of places are reasonably easy, though you have to look out for Venezia/venice, Firenze/Florence, etc.

but why have all that stress? my suggestion is to go to one of the lakes. They are ideally suited to families with children of whatever age as you can get around by the lake steamers that will take you most everywhere you might want to go. also the shores are nice and flat for buggy-pushing.

there is all sorts of accommodation from hotels to apartments.

with only a week I'd pick just one.

I totally agree with the post above. My kids had a blast in both Stresa and Bellagio when they were small. And it was a really easy, stress-free vacation.

that sounds wonderful, thanks for the suggestion.

Reb77,

This may be a stupid question but when are you going? The time of year might influence where you go. I have not been to the Lakes region but might a spring/summer holiday be different than a fall winter/holiday?

The OP is going in September which would be perfect (weather-wise) for the lake region although the more popular, easy-to-reach destinations will still get crowded on weekends.

But the northern lake region is far from where your husband will be in Latina. I assume he'll meet you on arrival wherever you land. If Milan, that's 5.5 hours on the train for him. If you rent a car and drive from there, it's about 1-2 hours to your final destination. If you land at Rome, he's only 1.2-2 hours on the train to meet you but then it's about 7 hours of driving to your final destination. You could train to one of the lakes from either airport, but it would involve at least one change somewhere. Sounds like a lot of time and effort to me.

I suggest you fly into Rome, have your husband meet you there, rent a car and drive (about 2 hours) to the Lake Bolsena area. From there you can easily explore interesting towns in northern Lazio (like Viterbo, Bagnoregio), southern Tuscany (like Pitigliano, Pienza, San Quirico) and western Umbria (like Orvieto, Todi, Deruta), all within an hour's drive of Bolsena. If you stick to secondary roads (as opposed to the Autostrada), it's not likely you'll encounter impatient local drivers.

thank you for the reply jean. I spent the entire day yesterday researching on this and now i am even more confused then before. here are my two top picks:
-From the pictures, i am soo tempted to just do the amalfi coast and venice.i know i would loveeeeeeee it but still not sure if its doable with a baby.
-We can stay at the lake region and do a scenic day train trip to switzerland.
what do you guys think?

Save Venice and the Amalfi Coast for another time. In Venice you'd have to watch the little one all the time; there are no railings on the canals! And the Amalfi Coast is all stairs. The views from the hillsides above the sea are beautiful but it's all very steep. You'd have to carry the baby everywhere.

Your second option is much more appropriate for travel with a small child.

Oh...I just replied on your OTHER post, when you were traveling in July. September is a bit better. I still don't know where your train trip begins and ends...or which Lake you are talking about.

Have you travelled with this baby much yet? If you really want to do a lot of travel to various destinations, maybe the baby's Grandparents would like to take care of him/her while you and DH have a lovely 2nd honeymoon? When my kids were that young, just going to the beach for a week was about the best we could manage, sanity-wise.

We can stay at the lake region and do a scenic day train trip to switzerland.
what do you guys think?>>

depends which lake you stay at. lake Como offers the best chance to go to Switzerland, Maggiore is further away, and if you're at Garda, forget it.

and please forget venice and the amalfi coast. you will find then very difficult to negotiate with a baby, plus they are a long way from each other.

oh damn looks like venice and amalfi is out of the question i'll look into lake como etc. i wish grandparents could come on this trip but thats not gonna happen and the baby is getting more and more difficult to handle..it was so much better when she was a newborn, i could go anywhere and do anything.

honestly reb, there are quite a few threads on Como and it is by no means a poor second to your first choices!

you will find plenty to do and the area is very lovely.

i believe you. the problem is that i am not convinced that lake como is really an italy experience. we have spent plenty of time around lakes and mountains in US, not sure how como is any different. I am not planning on a realxing vacation with stuff to do. i wanted to see beauty, something like amalfi, blue grotto etc and move on. our vacations are always like that-we just go go go and see a lot. we never spend more than half hour in dinner etc. Last time we went to colorado; we covered denver, did camping in the rockies, drove back and forth to aspen, did the hot springs in total 5 days including flying in and out of boston. it was perfect, we didnt feel rushed. So thats what i am looking to do again but i am slightly worried since i have a baby in tow now.
Another thing my husband suggested was fly into rome, go to milan, lake como and then train trip in swiss. is this too much?

Honestly, since you do have a baby in tow now, and a 1 year old really demands an eating/ sleep schedule of some kind, you really should think hard about go-go-go way of traveling. Not saying don't take the trip, but rushing madly about may not be the best way to spend a week. People who DO travel with yoing children have given you some good ideas here.

we never spend more than half hour in dinner etc. Last time we went to colorado; we covered denver, did camping in the rockies, drove back and forth to aspen, did the hot springs in total 5 days including flying in and out of boston. it was perfect, we didnt feel rushed. So thats what i am looking to do again but i am slightly worried since i have a baby in tow now.>>

did you do this with a 1 year old baby? no. even you i think can see that it would not be sensible. so why do you think it would work in Italy? and why on earth do you think that Lake Como is less italian than the Amalfi?

actually it's ideal if you want to go to Switzerland, do some sightseeing, explore the lake by boat, etc. etc.

if you want a city experience, Milan is not that far away, and you might at a pinch decide to divide your time between the two places. but Rome as well? - good luck with that!

Depending on where you stay on Lake Como, Bergamo is also close.

But I'll repeat my suggestion of the Lake Bolsena area. The lake is a destination in itself, but there are lovely, interesting small towns within a short drive.

ok so what if we fly into and stay in milan and do day trips to lake como, lake maggoire, lake bergamo (or maybe just two)and a 2 day one night train trip to switzerland (eg bernia express). that sounds reaosnable in a week not including flying?

reb- better.

however, how are you going to take these day trips? i know that these places look as if they are close together, but i just looked up Milan to Bellagio on viamichelin.it, and the 79 kms take about 2 hours to drive, each way.

that's a long time out of a day. you will actually save time if you split the trip up, rather than going backwards and forwards.

a couple of days in Milan, 3 on Como [or Maggiore] and 2 in Switzerland would make a well-balanced trip, but you'll have to hope that your little one is the adaptable type!

I have to say that I like Jean's idea - a week near Lake Bolsena would definitely be Italian!

We have traveled quite a bit with our now 6 year old daughter. I used to travel the way you talk about, never more than a few nights in one place. After having a kid, we completely changed our style. Now, even as she gets older there is no way I will go back. At first it was important to not be changing all the time since with naps and sleep schedules, we didn't have time to waste moving around. It is also easier to get apartments for longer stays, and these are really nice. Even if you sleep at similar times, you have more space.

We spend most of our time in Italy in an argriturismo outside Montepulciano. You need to have a car and we really enjoy the food and the wine. Most of what we do is visit small towns and relax.

I guess what I am saying is that whatever you decide to do, slowing down isn't so bad.

I've been to Colorado and other areas of the West...Lake Como is NOTHING like it...except maybe that H2O is present. We spent 5 days in Bellagio last fall. We did daytrips to other towns on the ferry two days, we hiked up into the hills another, and we drove to Lake Lucern ( Switzerland) one day. if you want another location in Italy, there is a nice trip report that starts in Milan, which was posted here in the past week...

But, you'd better start making reservations soon. September is a very popular time for travel to Italy.

How about on the coast in Abruzzo. Last year we were thinking of going there for a vacation in Summer - but ended up not going there, and I have shortlisted a brand new apartment complex called Residence Vista Mare in Roseto degli Abruzzi. The rates are extremely reasonable and the apartments are brand new. It would probably be still nice to go swimming, and the beach has a very shallow bed, perfect for very small kids.

Another apartment complex I had shortlisted was Residence Mareamare at Grottammare in the region Le Marche a bit more to the north in the Adriatic.

Alternatively, furthere to the north in the region of Emilia Romagna, you might be interested in spending a week in Rimini, the tourists would have calmed down by September, making a visit to the mosaics, the aquarium in nearby Cattolica, maybe an outing to the Mirabilandia fun park, and the Italy in Miniature park.

Alternatively, you might be interested in renting an apartment in the beautiful countryside in Umbria for a week.

I would definitely prefer not to go for a holiday in cities with a one-year old child. I would prefer renting an apartment and basing myself in one place.

uhoh-busted - care to reassure the OP that Lake Como is sufficiently italian?

he he i beleive you. i guess when i imagine "MY" italy holiday, i imagine amalfi and venice not a lake town. i am pretty sure its beautiful and very italian.
ok i better go do more research now.

he he i beleive you. i guess when i imagine "MY" italy holiday, i imagine amalfi and venice not a lake town. i am pretty sure its beautiful and very italian.
ok i better go do more research now.

reb - please come back and tell us what you decide and how you get on.

who knows - you may prove us all wrong, and I honestly hope that you do.

aww thats very sweet of you.

How about a week on the Lake Maggiore? There are easy ferry crossings to Locarno and other towns in Switzerland.

I think I do understand though what you mean by wanting to taste the real Italy. Northern Italy has a lot of Swiss and Austrian influence. In fact when we went to the Dolomites in Alte Adige, still in Italy, the owners of the hotel did not even know how to speak Italian, but spoke it Austrian or German. Many Italian towns in the very north of Italy certainly does not give you the feeling that you are anywhere in Italy, even regarding their cuisine. This is partly due to the fact, that after the war the Italians took some of their territory. But like as far as Trento, all people spoke Italian.

So, it is understanable that if you are going very close to the Swiss border on the Lakes, it is not going to be the proper Italian experience. Maybe you can base yourself to the south on the Lakes.

If you want the real authentic Italian atmosphere, choose central Italy, like in Tuscany and Umbria, or just visit the south.

I do agree with the others that Venice is not really practical for a one year old. If you really would like to go to the south of Italy, maybe you might be interested in staying in a resort in Puglia that has all the amenities. I have never been to Puglia, but Fodorites who have visited all relate how lovely it is. Jamikins is there on holiday right now, and she is even giving us trip reports during her vacation, emphasizing how lovely it is over there. Also, the weather would be warmer than in the north, and it is very likely that you will swim in the lovely sea waters of southern Italy.

I am giving you some hotels I might suggest for you to look up that might be very adaptable since you are having a one year old child with you:

Borgo Egnazia Resort

Masseria Bagnara Resort & Spa

Hotel L'Arcangelo

Leone di Messopia

Alternatively, if you are really eager to visit the Amalfi Coast, then I would either stay in Sorrento (find a hotel on the coast facing the harbour with the beautiful view of the Vesuvius and Gulf of Naples, plus the ferry to Capri leaves right from the harbour), which does not have the many steps to reach everywhere like Positano has, or in Amalfi or Maiori or Minori area, the last having the longest stretch of unbroken beach on the Amalfi coast. Try and find a nice hotel maybe with pool, then you would be at liberty on whether to just linger around and take it easy, or else travel around the area for a day or two hiring a private driver if you are not having a hired car, as it won't be easy for sure using public transport there with a one-year old child.

If you would like me to research for you a bit regarding accomodation on Amalfi coast, I would be happy to do so, just inform me in which area or town you would prefer to stay.

oh Anna, thank you sooo much. I am going to look into all three options and hopefully pick one real soon. Last night i just got so cold feet suddenly since everyone talks about difficulties with baby. i was telling my husband if we are spending so much money going to italy and everything is going to be so tough with the baby and not even getting to see a lot of it, should i rather not go with him this time. Should i just save my money and wait a few more years. dont know i am not much excited now, i am scared its gonna be a very stressful time with the baby

reb, what most of us suggest is to go but dial back the number of destinations. You will see a different Italy but a more real Italy than ticking off a list of the best known sights. Spending more time in one place, especially with an apartment, you'll get to know the grocery store down the street, the baker, the gelato-seller, and so on. People will talk to you and admire the baby.

If you rent a one-bedroom apartment, the baby can sleep in another room. No need to tiptoe around, keeping quiet.

Have you shown your husband this thread? Maybe that would help him understand that travel with a baby is a different experience.

i agree 100%. After reading all these helpful inputs and doings ome research i am inclning more towards speding the week in tuscany region and doing daytrips to different towns around there.

Tuscany and Umbria are lovely, but you will have to do some travels to visit the different towns and cities, as they are not a stone's throw away.

Do not lose heart about travelling with your one year old child. It is not as relaxing of course as travelling just with your husband, but not that hard or impossible either. When my first child was a one year old baby we went to Sicily for a week, and stayed in a lovely resort there, I enjoyed it so much that I wished that I stayed longer.

During these last 9 years we have been going holidays once or twice a year in many different countries in Europe, but nearly always once a year to Italy with a child who is disabled, often making three or four different stops, sometimes in different regions. Some people do ask how we manage and do not lose heart, but now that I got used to it so much, it would never deter me from going on holidays, or taking her with me, and trying to squeeze in everything.. Of course there is the feeding (at least now she eats everything), carrying and nappy changing to do, but those jobs are done anyway, wherever you are. Naturally it is not so peaceful or relaxing as when you are just with DH (lol I got used to Fodors' abbreviations now), but then it is in turn rewarding to be together as a family and seeing everyone enjoying themselves. Having two elder boys in their late teens helps of course to carry stuff etc, but we used to all go even when they were much younger and we used to have to take care of them as well. But at least we never have to stay in queues as we wouold have priority to enter everywhere, like museums, fun park rides, reserved parking space, etc. When they were younger my boys used to be so proud of their little sister, and used to think of her as so special since we were treated like VIP.

But we always hire a car to drive around, and it is so convenient to find it waiting for you at the airport and then dropping it off prior to a flight. Naturally the more you drive in different countries, the more you get experienced and confident.

As the saying goes, when there is a will there is a way.

But till you get used to travelling with small kids, and because of limitations regarding food etc (as one year old do not eat everything like us), I would suggest that you stay in one accomodation, preferably in an apartment or apartment hotel for the whole week, and getting around from there. Many accomodations in Tuscany offer mini or large apartments, and would still offer breakfast and sometimes even dinner.

If you decide to go to Tuscany or Umbria, you might go to a nice agriturismo that has a pool, good food and lovely views, and you can go on day tours from there. I don't know if I already mentioned it to you, but in 2010 we stayed in an agriturismo called Agriturismo Nicolai Palagetto di Sotto in Tuscany, it is a lovely agriturismo in the countryside, but still very close (about 850m, easily walkable) to the beautiful medieval town of San Gimignano. The produce their own wine and olive oil, the breakfast was very good, and extremely nice staff. We went in December, and since it was low season they did not offer half board, but in September they probably do - on Tripadvisor reviewers commented how good there evening meals are. You will find agriturismo like this all over Tuscany and Umbria.

I really would not suggest you stay in Florence. It is far too busy and crowdy with tourists all the time of year, not really the place to base yourself with a one-year old child. A day trip would be more than enough for you. Nothing beats the scenary and lovely fresh air of Tuscany and Umbria, if you are more inclined to visit that area of Italy.

Near the Italian lakes would be lovely as well, visiting the beautiful towns around the lake - it is on one of my toplists now, or alternatively Sorrento, or Amalfi, Minori or Maiori area. The advantage in visisting the latter is that chances are that the weather will be much warmer in September, and it is nice be near the beautiful Mediterranean sea. But then again, the scenary near Lake Como/Lake Maggiore is stunning.

It is a tough decision for sure.

Take with you small toys to entertain the baby during travel time, plus of course plenty of snacks and drink (especially for southern Italy also sunblock, hat, etc).

reb - I just got this idea which might really sound appealing for you - Maybe you can book an apartment for a week in the west coast of Tuscany like in the seaside town of Lido di Camaiore (or in that area). From there you can very easily reach some towns and cities of Tuscany like Pisa, Florence and Lucca which are close by (and on the way see the lovely countryside scenary of Tuscany). Cinque Terre is also very close.

That way you would be able to have the best of both worlds, be close to the beach and coast and also able to do sightseeing in Tuscan towns and even in Ligura (where there are the Cinque Terre).

anna - the OP has had another change of heart and is back on the "if it's tuesday it must be Rome" idea - see her new thread.

personally i think that your idea of renting somewhere on the tuscan coast is a great one.

annhig i had a talk with my husband about this and we figured we will plan the trip and if we feel like this is too much and baby is not happy, we will slow down/skip a few towns etc.
usually when we travel, we like to do mostly site seeing. so even just driving thru tuscany towns one day would be seeing tuscany for us or sitting in the train seeing the alps would be seeing a part of CH.
THANKS TO EVERYONE for all the ideas.

I have three children so I think that allows me to ask " can grandparents watch the baby for a week?"

i wont last one day without my baby.

Your 1 year old is not going to be happy sitting in a car or a train for a full day sightseeing, driving around. And you do not drive 'through' towns in Europe, you drive around the outskirts or must park and walk into the centers of towns to see anything. In most, parking is restricted or forbidden in the charming centers. Same for trains - that is a lot of in and out of cars, unfurling strollers, in and out of strollers. Something to consider.

we figured we will plan the trip and if we feel like this is too much and baby is not happy, we will slow down/skip a few towns etc.>>

reb - i just don't get how you are going to do this.

Presumably you are going to pre-book your accommodation, so you will be locked into whatever plan you eventually decide on.

couldn't you just, for this one week, try to slow down and see how it works? again, i have to say that Anna's idea of the apartment on the coast is an excellent one.

So, will your baby be exactly 1 year old or a little older?

My view is different than everyone else's -- I guess because when we had our baby and everyone said you've got to give up traveling for a while, my husband and I were quite the contrarians.

Our son was just 13 months old when we visited Paris and Italy in the month of September. Fortunately, he had been walking (and running) for 3 months so was pretty steady. We visited Venice, Florence and Rome that trip. Our son LOVED Venice. The canals were easy to navigate with a stroller and a baby back pack. He loved chasing the pigeons in St. Mark's Square and climbing on the lions outside the Cathedral. He loved the boat buses. He loved the Lido. Italians love kids, so he was welcome everywhere.

I wouldn't rule out the Amalfi Coast either. If you were to take a train to Salerno, you could then take a ferry to Amalfi or to Positano, and get a hotel at the bottom of the hills, like the Buca di Bacco or Villa La Tartana in Positano. That way you'd be close to the water and your baby can play in the water, but could slowly make it up the hill to the mid-point, then take one of their crazy buses around town and all the up to Montepertuso if you wanted.

surfergirl - glad you had such a great time with your little one.

did he/you suffer from jetlag at all? did he sleep on the plane? How long did you spend in each place? what sort of accommodation did you have?

the answers could make a lot of difference to the success of the OP's trip?

I have been to Italy with a very small child and I have 2 suggestions.
Santa Margherita Liguire- Stay at the Grand Hotel Miramar or Hotel Continental. You have a beach, you can take the ferry or bus to Portofino. You can grab the tran and go to Cinque Terre.
Get a really good stroller. The one we took was pretty good on cobblestone but not the best.
2nd Idea- Go to Positano and stay down at the beach. You can jump on ferry's to take you every where. You can collapse the stroller and take it with you. Rent taxi's in Capri and hire a boat to take you around.
Neither of these ideas will be as easy with a small child as they would with just adults but you could do it and it could be a lot of fun. I know we had a great time. I will admit the Santa Margherita might cater more to families with small children.

surfergirl and bougainvillea thank you so much for the encouragement and suggestions, i appreciate it. I have posted about this a lot here on fodors and you two are the only ones that didnt tell me i was planning a miserable trip due to baby in tow. But annhig has asked some key questions and those are the major concerns that everyone has talked about. i have only 9 days in hand and now after reading all the responses i am seriously getting cold feet. I had a long talk with my husband last night and he still feels knowing ourselves we can do this so i pretty much told him i'd rather cancel this trip if it means misery for us and the baby unless he is willing to stay put in one town for the entire week and he is not very keen on that

my baby will be 14 months in sep.

Oh my, I would not cancel this trip. You will have a blast. You probably travel similar to my husband and I. We love to be on the go and see so much.

People on Fodors do post great ideas but they don't always match up with how other people like to travel.

The main downside to travel with a small child is the need for more taxi's and sometimes you have to eat earlier.

I have never regretted any of my trips with my daughter, well I will admit it is not always fun on the plane but it is not a huge deal.

How about a compromise with your husband: by all means go, but pick 2 places to settle, and then decide your day trips depending on how you all feel that day. This way you are not packing and unpacking, and moving, every day. If you can get an apartment, even better, then you are not having to eat out with a baby for all meals. Or at least a B&B with a breakfast room. It's really all about balance.

It depends on the personality of the child. Some kids travel more easily, others don't. And it sounds like this is a more rambunctious one.

reb, try leaving your husband home with the baby for a whole day. Sounds like you could use the rest. And maybe he'll change his tune.

Anna_Galea's suggestion is exactly right, and staying anywhere in the Florence area where you could visit Lucca, Siena, Pisa, San Gimignano, Volterra, Florence, etc. would give you more than enough to do for a week.

Rome would work wonderfully also. You could see Rome and also Orvieto, Ostia Antica, Hadrian's Villa, etc.

Unlike most places in the US, you can base in one or two areas of Italy and still travel around and visit or see something new (and amazing) every day without going far. So, don't cancel the trip. Just plan a better one. Get your husband to see that he doesn't have to be stuck in that one place just because he is sleeping there.

We used to travel the way you do. Then, kind of by accident, we ended up staying in one area of Italy and exploring for several days. We quickly realized how much we gained by doing that. Italy, especially, is a place where it hardly matters where you are. The beauty and things to see are endless.

We did a wonderful week in Venice: exploring Venice, the islands, towns north, etc.

We did another week in Vicenza: visited Verona, Padua, Venice, etc.

We spent a week in Rome once and ten days on the AC once.

Here is the thing. You will not be cheating yourselves by doing this. Racing around from country to country does not let you see more - it only uses up more precious vacation time on the train or road.

Believe me. All of these are places that people travel to see. Many tours of Italy will have Siena, Lucca, Pisa, San G, and Florence on the tour.

Perhaps this baby is a blessing in more ways that you thought. He/she will help you to have a more in-depth travel experience. Don't cancel your trip. Your trip, if you re-think your approach, will actually be so much better than you ever anticipated.

thanks everyone. I am hoping to make a plan where we can settle down in tuscany area and do daytrips from there. surfergirl's description of venice thru a kid's eye sounds awesome and i know my husband is dying to visit venice.is it crazy to combine tuscany and a quick venice trip for total 9 days? are there any superfast trains that can move us from tuscany area to venice. Perhaps we could fly out of venice instead of doing a round trip. maybe i still sound a bit too ambitious but i thought it was worth asking.

hi reb - sounds a mich better plan to me.

IMO your best option would be to follow Anna's suggestion of renting an apartment on the coast near Pisa [you could drive up the coast from R ome or even get the train as the Rome -Genoa line goes through Pisa where you could hire a car] for a week or so, then finish your trip in venice, and as you say, fly home from there. By then you will have established a rhythm and a routine for your little one who should adapt more easily to the change of venue.

then get the train from Pisa to Venice - it's fast from Florence, where you have to change, and the whole journey will take about 3 1/2 hours, give or take. have a look at www.trenitalia.com, but beware - you have to use venezia and firenze, rather than their english equivalents.

just so as you know, according to viamichelin.com, it's nearly 500 kms from Pisa to Venice, and it's about 6 hours drive. so the train is a better option.

thanks! let me propose this plan to my husband, i think he should like this.

hooray - fingers crossed!

PS - my DH likes Venice too - i like it as well, but not half as much as he does!

Sounds like a great plan except that, it might work better in reverse. Start the trip in Venice and depart from Florence or Rome because it is easier to fly into Venice and out of Rome. Flying into Venice is a breeze, but flights departing from Venice usually leave at really, really early times, depriving you of any sleep the night before the flight, and even getting to the airport at that time of the morning isn't fun.

So, since your DH wants Venice (I also think it is one of the most wonderful places in the world), you could fly into Venice early morning and spend two/three nights (I would do three because of jet lag and there is so much to do there, even one of the islands), then train to Tuscany area and stay in an apartment for the rest of your time.

Hope this turns into your best trip ever!

If you extend your vacation to 9 days, it is certainly possible to do 2 stops, and you would have an even nicer vacation.

In that case, I would stay 6 days in Tuscany and 3 days in Venice, so that you would have some time to relax in Venice, 2 days is not really worth the hassle. If you are going to be driving, you can drive to Venice from Tuscany.

Alternatively you can train or take a low cost airline from Pisa to Venice (check out Ryan air or Easy Jet, they do internal flights in many cities in Italy). It is an easy drive to the aiport, we returned home from Pisa on our last trip.

Then fly back home out of Venice.

It is a matter of taste, but I would not want to base myself for 6 days in the city of Florence, it is always too crowdy.

There is no need to add Rome as well, unless you husband needs to be in Latina for the last part of the trip. So you are going to be with him in Latina, or are you joining him for the 9 days' vacation?

If you are meeting him in Latina, then you have no choice but to start your vacation from central Italy. If you can plan it any way you want, it would be a good idea to fly into Venice and return home from Pisa airport.

Just check for flights carefully.
Look at some of the other posts/threads about how much of a hassle it is to get transport in the wee hours in Venice. You probably don't want to end your vacation with baby, getting up at 2:00 or 3:00 A.M. to catch a pre-hired boat, to get to the airport for a pre-dawn flight. You might be tired anyway, but this would guarantee that you are all completely wiped out when you get home.

There are a few international flights that depart Venice at a decent hour. You might get lucky and find one, depending on your destination. If you do, then Venice at the end would be wonderful. If not, do Venice first. It is a perfect place to get over jet lag.

plan approved, i need to do some homework now. I will certainly plan to start my trip in venice and DH can directly fly there from latina instead of me going there.. so 3 days in venice and rest in tuscany it is!
My heartfelt thanks to everyone who so selflessly took the time and effort to answer my questions and concerns.
If any of you have actually done the driving from venice to tuscany area please fill me on that. That way we can just rent a car when we get out of venice and keep it until end. It will be great not to haul luggage and baby supplies to trains, buses and planes if can avoid it.
thanks again

reb - all the car rental offices are at the huge piazzale roma which is the end [or beginning] of the line so far as roads are concerned in Venice - all the buses start and end there, and there are vaporetto [water bus] stops there too.

if you arrive by air into Venice, there are a number of ways to get to your hotel - bus to the piazzale Roma followed by a vaporetto, the alilaguna boat [a bit like a bus] from the airport water dock to one of several stops in and around venice, and a private water taxi. [the priciest].

which is going to be easiest may depend on where you decide to stay.

if you can co-ordinate yours and your husband's arrival at the Venice airport, [aka Marco Polo] that would make your journey into Venice a lot easier.

You made the right decision for sure reb, in starting off in Venice and then drive to Tuscany. As I already suggested, if you book a hotel to the north of Pisa, but still on the Tuscany border, you will be near the mediterranean coast (you mentioned you would like to be near the sea) and by car you can easily reach the Cinque Terre or other nearby coastal towns in Liguria, and also towns and cities in Tuscany (considering your location I would choose from Lucca, Florence, Pisa, or even maybe San Gimignano. Or else, if you would be really enjoying it, relax by the beach. Try and find a hotel on the coast with a private beach (or beachfront) and pool, and maybe also a kids' playground with little swings and that might even provide some animation for entertainment. It will be a fun-filled holiday for sure.

Try and find flights out of Pisa to head back home, or if that is not possible out of Bologna. I am not sure but I think there is also an airport in Florence, which would be closer than Bologna. And I think there is also an airport in Genoa, and also in Verona. If that is not possible, then you would have to drive either to Milan or Rome, always dropping your car at the airport. Again, no hassle for transfers.

I am sure you are going to find it so very convenient hiring a car to drive around, especially with you little child. No buses or train waiting and dragging and carrying baggages and stuff, seaching for schedules of buses etc and having to stick with them. It gives you the opportunity to be at liberty to do what you please during your vacation.

Last December we hired a car from Treviso airport, but since you want your car at the end of your stay in Venice, you should take the advice of another Fodorite and pick up your car from the Piazzale Termini central station in Venice and start off from there. Leave in the morning and make a stop for lunch on the way to the Tuscan coast. It would be about a four hours' drive in total, and on very good roads and not hilly if you take autostradas, and on the way you will see the beautiful Appenine mountains in the background. We drove all the way from Madonna di Campiglio to Citta di Castello last December, so we crossed through the area.

Enjoy your trip. I just love bella Italia!!!. I always keep fingers crossed that rest of my family would not tell me that they got fed up going to Italy. But I am crafty, I try to take them to different regions that they might enjoy, feed them the Italian glorious food, and often combine an amusement park or other stuff that they like. So there will always be plenty of fun things to do as your child gets older, and seeing him enjoying it will make it all worthwhile, whatever age.