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Milan overnight or not en route to MXP with 2 kids

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We will be staying in Rome for about a week in early September (family of 4). It's much more economical to fly in/out of MXP and book train travel to/from Rome. For heading home we can't decide whether to keep our booking in Rome as-is or to cut it a day short and spend one night in Milan as we are heading strath to Rome on the way in. Our main concern, of course, being the train schedule - with a 4pm international flight back to US - how early do we need to get to MXP? With 2 kids in tow we can't reasonably leave super early in the AM, so I'm looking at trains that get to MXP around 12-1pm. Of course, I'm also concerned that a train strike could completely screw up the plan to do train to plane in one day. Am I playing with fire here? Suggestions?
Also - for staying in Milan for one night with kids - suggestions on neighborhoods/hotels?

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