Is seventeen too young to travel to Europe?
Nov 21st, 2014, 11:32 PM
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Is seventeen too young to travel to Europe?
Is Seventeen too young to travel to Europe?
It has been four months since I have arrived back in Sydney Australia after living over seas (Basel, Switzerland) for the past three years.
Unfortunately, I had to leave behind a beautiful city, which holds many memories, and some amazing people, one in which is my boyfriend, whom I am doing long distance with. In May - June of 2015, he will be graduating. I would absolutely love to travel back to Basel and see him graduate, as well as spend time with friends. After living in Basel for three years, being use to traveling continuously, and feeling comfortable with the language barrier, I feel more than ready to travel independently, not only because I want to see my boyfriend, but because I just love to travel. However, my parents seem to think seventeen is too young. To some extent I agree with them, but for the most part I feel they are just being a typical parent, over protective and most definitely over dramatising any situation that could happen whilst I am away. So, referring back to my question, is seventeen too young to travel alone?
It has been four months since I have arrived back in Sydney Australia after living over seas (Basel, Switzerland) for the past three years.
Unfortunately, I had to leave behind a beautiful city, which holds many memories, and some amazing people, one in which is my boyfriend, whom I am doing long distance with. In May - June of 2015, he will be graduating. I would absolutely love to travel back to Basel and see him graduate, as well as spend time with friends. After living in Basel for three years, being use to traveling continuously, and feeling comfortable with the language barrier, I feel more than ready to travel independently, not only because I want to see my boyfriend, but because I just love to travel. However, my parents seem to think seventeen is too young. To some extent I agree with them, but for the most part I feel they are just being a typical parent, over protective and most definitely over dramatising any situation that could happen whilst I am away. So, referring back to my question, is seventeen too young to travel alone?
Nov 22nd, 2014, 12:40 AM
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I think that's a question that can only be answered by your parents - people on a travel board have absolutely no knowledge of your personality, abilities, maturity etc.
Do really think that they'll be swayed by the opinions of strangers? Di
Do really think that they'll be swayed by the opinions of strangers? Di
Nov 22nd, 2014, 12:44 AM
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It's impossible to answer that question without knowing you. Some seventeen year olds are perfectly capapble of going off to the other side of the world on their own. Others can barely navigate their own home country without adult supervision.
When you lived in Basel, was that with your parents? Do they have any adult people they know there and trust to look after you on arrival? Do they know your boyfriend?
Lots of European teenagers go on backpacking trips without parents. But they usually don't have to do deal with visas within Europe. And I'm sure they have parental permission.
The way I see it there are three questions.
1. What does the law say? If you go to Europe alone, do you need your parents permission? Could they report you as a runaway and get you sent home? Will you be allowed into Europe by immigration authorities?
2. Emotional and intellectual maturity. Can you handle any potential problems? What will you do if things go wrong? If a thief steals your passport and money? Of course, I know people over thirty years old who are not capable of dealing with such things.
3. Money. Who will pay for the trip? If your parents don't want you to go, they aren't likely to pay for it. Can you afford to go without their help?
When you lived in Basel, was that with your parents? Do they have any adult people they know there and trust to look after you on arrival? Do they know your boyfriend?
Lots of European teenagers go on backpacking trips without parents. But they usually don't have to do deal with visas within Europe. And I'm sure they have parental permission.
The way I see it there are three questions.
1. What does the law say? If you go to Europe alone, do you need your parents permission? Could they report you as a runaway and get you sent home? Will you be allowed into Europe by immigration authorities?
2. Emotional and intellectual maturity. Can you handle any potential problems? What will you do if things go wrong? If a thief steals your passport and money? Of course, I know people over thirty years old who are not capable of dealing with such things.
3. Money. Who will pay for the trip? If your parents don't want you to go, they aren't likely to pay for it. Can you afford to go without their help?
Nov 22nd, 2014, 02:05 AM
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I wouldn't pay for my 17 yr old to travel.. will your parents pay for you.. is that what you expect?
If you want to go back and see your boyfriend( which frankly I still think is primary reason) and to travel... work and save some money and do it then.
Age is not a huge factor.. I think some 17 yr olds would do fine.. but I doubt your parents are over dramatizing and by saying so I can see why they may be nervous ,, you are not willing to understand their concerns.. but I think you would be wise to wait till you were 18 as then there is no hassles booking hotels or hostels, at 17 there may be some hassles( although not insurmountable)
I think if you really miss your bf ask parents if you could just go back and stay with family friends for awhile..
PS.. none of us know full story.. for instance.. maybe boyfriend is creepy 27 yr old bum.. lol .. that might influence what some of us say..
If you want to go back and see your boyfriend( which frankly I still think is primary reason) and to travel... work and save some money and do it then.
Age is not a huge factor.. I think some 17 yr olds would do fine.. but I doubt your parents are over dramatizing and by saying so I can see why they may be nervous ,, you are not willing to understand their concerns.. but I think you would be wise to wait till you were 18 as then there is no hassles booking hotels or hostels, at 17 there may be some hassles( although not insurmountable)
I think if you really miss your bf ask parents if you could just go back and stay with family friends for awhile..
PS.. none of us know full story.. for instance.. maybe boyfriend is creepy 27 yr old bum.. lol .. that might influence what some of us say..
Nov 22nd, 2014, 03:24 AM
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Agree that we need to know more.
Were you living with parents in Switz?
Are you expecting parents to pay for this trip? Or will you be financing it yourself?
How old is the BF and what is the relationship with him? Do your parents know and like him?
What are your plans after the trip? Are you enrolled in college at home so they know you intend to return?
I tend to think of 17 year olds as adults - since I was self-supporting at that age - putting myself through college. But some kids are not capable of coping with all sorts of problems at that point. Or focused on making a strong future for themselves - versus just having a good time.
Were you living with parents in Switz?
Are you expecting parents to pay for this trip? Or will you be financing it yourself?
How old is the BF and what is the relationship with him? Do your parents know and like him?
What are your plans after the trip? Are you enrolled in college at home so they know you intend to return?
I tend to think of 17 year olds as adults - since I was self-supporting at that age - putting myself through college. But some kids are not capable of coping with all sorts of problems at that point. Or focused on making a strong future for themselves - versus just having a good time.
Nov 22nd, 2014, 03:26 AM
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Caveat: I didn't travel at that age - I had no money. I received a small inheritance and at 19 spent 5 week of the summer in europe with my BF - but was paying for it myself and had been living on my own for more than 2 years. And my BF was a 24 year old grad student and also self-supporting.
Nov 22nd, 2014, 04:32 AM
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Here comes the European view.
Here in Europe, maturity comes much earlier than in, say, the USA. The legal age in Europe is 18 - with all rights and responsibilities.
You find many Europeans travelling on their own with 15, 16 or 17 years. I did it myself, usually together with a friend or two. And in times before cell phones.
With cell phones, internet and credit cards, you are always safe. If something extraordinary happens (like an accident or so), you can easily communicate with your parents or others can do.
In Europe, you are extremely safe. Almost everywhere, English is spoken, food and water are safe, medical services are the best in the world and the crime rate is very low. You have public transportation and you already know the ground. What should happen?
What you can do is putting a sheet of paper in your wallet with the following text:
Für den Notfall:
Ich bin aus Sydney, Australien, und reise allein durch Europa. Im Notfall bitte meine Eltern verständigen.
Namen der Eltern: (names of parents)
Telefon: (parents' telephone number)
email: (email adress)
Enjoy your trip to Europe!
Here in Europe, maturity comes much earlier than in, say, the USA. The legal age in Europe is 18 - with all rights and responsibilities.
You find many Europeans travelling on their own with 15, 16 or 17 years. I did it myself, usually together with a friend or two. And in times before cell phones.
With cell phones, internet and credit cards, you are always safe. If something extraordinary happens (like an accident or so), you can easily communicate with your parents or others can do.
In Europe, you are extremely safe. Almost everywhere, English is spoken, food and water are safe, medical services are the best in the world and the crime rate is very low. You have public transportation and you already know the ground. What should happen?
What you can do is putting a sheet of paper in your wallet with the following text:
Für den Notfall:
Ich bin aus Sydney, Australien, und reise allein durch Europa. Im Notfall bitte meine Eltern verständigen.
Namen der Eltern: (names of parents)
Telefon: (parents' telephone number)
email: (email adress)
Enjoy your trip to Europe!
Nov 22nd, 2014, 05:31 AM
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First, your post is not written well. You say (in first person) you were living in Switzerland the past three years, and now you're back in Sydney, Australia, but you don't clarify anything else. Readers can easily assume you were on your own in Basel for three years, so what's up with your question?
Mary Stuart ruled two nations before she was 18 years old. At age 16, she married Francis II and became ruling queen, however briefly. It seems to me times were much tougher for a young woman in the 1500's. I won't even mention what 17-year-olds were doing in Ancient Rome.
These days, for some parents, obsessively coddling their kids has elevated to "normal" status. I have a steady turnover of young interns in my business, and, occasionally, I meet a kid who is riddled with fear. And then I meet the parents…
The boyfriend issue would be more a red flag to me. Based on my own experience, I think a 17-year-old heart and mind are too young to truly understand love and romance, no matter how (pick your superlative) things appear at the moment. There are exceptions. And then there's the question of how much influence the BF experience is driving your desire.
Your request for travel independence might be treated differently if the BF didn't exist. Everything combined is asking a lot from any parent.
The simple answer to your question: I've met many 17-year-olds who were mature enough to handle what many would consider adult adventures. Our opinions won't matter much. If your parents are legally responsible for you and their love for you is all-powerful, their opinion is the only opinion that matters.
Find a way to empower their trust in you.
Mary Stuart ruled two nations before she was 18 years old. At age 16, she married Francis II and became ruling queen, however briefly. It seems to me times were much tougher for a young woman in the 1500's. I won't even mention what 17-year-olds were doing in Ancient Rome.
These days, for some parents, obsessively coddling their kids has elevated to "normal" status. I have a steady turnover of young interns in my business, and, occasionally, I meet a kid who is riddled with fear. And then I meet the parents…
The boyfriend issue would be more a red flag to me. Based on my own experience, I think a 17-year-old heart and mind are too young to truly understand love and romance, no matter how (pick your superlative) things appear at the moment. There are exceptions. And then there's the question of how much influence the BF experience is driving your desire.
Your request for travel independence might be treated differently if the BF didn't exist. Everything combined is asking a lot from any parent.
The simple answer to your question: I've met many 17-year-olds who were mature enough to handle what many would consider adult adventures. Our opinions won't matter much. If your parents are legally responsible for you and their love for you is all-powerful, their opinion is the only opinion that matters.
Find a way to empower their trust in you.
Nov 22nd, 2014, 06:55 AM
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Hi narteena,
When I was 13 years old and my sister was 15, we were attending boarding school in Switzerland. At the end of the term, we took an overnight train by ourselves from Switzerland to Spain, where my parents were living. Then we flew by ourselves from Spain to NYC to live with our grandmother.
We were already experienced world travellers at that age, so we didn't look at this as unusual or particularly challenging. This was in the 1960s, before there was even reliable international telephone service for the average guy.
As others have said, the answer is more of a function of you and your abilities than a strict function of your age.
Have fun as you plan!
s
When I was 13 years old and my sister was 15, we were attending boarding school in Switzerland. At the end of the term, we took an overnight train by ourselves from Switzerland to Spain, where my parents were living. Then we flew by ourselves from Spain to NYC to live with our grandmother.
We were already experienced world travellers at that age, so we didn't look at this as unusual or particularly challenging. This was in the 1960s, before there was even reliable international telephone service for the average guy.
As others have said, the answer is more of a function of you and your abilities than a strict function of your age.
Have fun as you plan!
s
Nov 22nd, 2014, 06:56 AM
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>>I think a 17-year-old heart and mind are too young to truly understand love and romance<<
Good afternoon, weisenheimer!
Some people here must be VERY old. And I am not young anymore. But my memory is still intact enough to remember how I felt when I was young.
I always encouraged my children to travel on their own. It did no harm to them.
Good afternoon, weisenheimer!
Some people here must be VERY old. And I am not young anymore. But my memory is still intact enough to remember how I felt when I was young.
I always encouraged my children to travel on their own. It did no harm to them.
Nov 22nd, 2014, 09:09 AM
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Just taking a train or plane yourself as a teen is NOT the same thing as taking off for Switz with who knows what plans or arrangements for a potentially long-terms stay. Out DDs took the Paris Metro and spent the day shopping by themselves when they were 11 and 14 - and we were fine with it - since they were forn NYC and used to large cities and subways. But I would not have ket them go alone, stay in a hostel for several weeks. Just not the same thing.
To me what is key are:
Who is paying for the trip - if it;s the parent's money they get to decide
what will the living arrangements be? If she is planning on staying with the BF - are they both mature enough for that and what is their relationship like (if he is also 17 or 18 does he have his own apt? would they be living with his parents? Would she be staying in a hostel? Or?)
I think relying on a relationship with a boy that age for living arrangements - esp after a separation of some time - may not be realistic.
To me what is key are:
Who is paying for the trip - if it;s the parent's money they get to decide
what will the living arrangements be? If she is planning on staying with the BF - are they both mature enough for that and what is their relationship like (if he is also 17 or 18 does he have his own apt? would they be living with his parents? Would she be staying in a hostel? Or?)
I think relying on a relationship with a boy that age for living arrangements - esp after a separation of some time - may not be realistic.
Nov 22nd, 2014, 12:31 PM
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I agree.. just travelling to meet family or friends by oneself is not the same as travelling independently.
I was flown to Amsterdam at 12( turned 13 that summer) to meet my French grandmother and spend the summer with her.. during that summer I was put on trains to visit other family members or family friends.
I didn't book the tickets.. I didn't book hotels, I was however capable, trustworthy and confident enough to follow instructions. That is however not the same as travelling independently .
My nieces are German.. living in Germany.. and yes.. they have travelled around on their own from 15 -16,, but they were never alone but usually with groups of friends going to music festivals.. and they are fully bilingual.. and mom and dad were only a phone call away if they got into a pickle.. maybe an hours flight or a few hours on the trains.. not an entire 24 hr flight away.. huge difference. My daughter has travelled locally around our province since last year at 17.. and I am encouraging her trip next year to Europe.. she will then just have turned 19.
I do agree though.. a lot depends on you.. and your parents know you best. You said you travelled around a bit while you lived in Switzerland.. so its not like your parents were super over protective..
I was flown to Amsterdam at 12( turned 13 that summer) to meet my French grandmother and spend the summer with her.. during that summer I was put on trains to visit other family members or family friends.
I didn't book the tickets.. I didn't book hotels, I was however capable, trustworthy and confident enough to follow instructions. That is however not the same as travelling independently .
My nieces are German.. living in Germany.. and yes.. they have travelled around on their own from 15 -16,, but they were never alone but usually with groups of friends going to music festivals.. and they are fully bilingual.. and mom and dad were only a phone call away if they got into a pickle.. maybe an hours flight or a few hours on the trains.. not an entire 24 hr flight away.. huge difference. My daughter has travelled locally around our province since last year at 17.. and I am encouraging her trip next year to Europe.. she will then just have turned 19.
I do agree though.. a lot depends on you.. and your parents know you best. You said you travelled around a bit while you lived in Switzerland.. so its not like your parents were super over protective..
Nov 22nd, 2014, 12:32 PM
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note.. just reread your post.. you didn't say you travelled independently but that you travelled constantly.. does that mean with your parents( in which case they still did all the planning etc )
Nov 22nd, 2014, 12:36 PM
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That you so much for your replies. Maybe I should have added a bit more detail.
I apologise if I did not make things clear enough x
1. I lived in Basel with my family.
2. I have a very open relationship with my parents, which is very important to me. whilst I was in Basel, I was always out the house. The transportation in Europe is amazing, reliable and easy to use. Hence my parents were willing to let me go out into town, stay out late, and come and go as I please. Bottom line is, my parents were comfortable with me going out, they trusted me and knew where I went.
3. I have every intention to pay for this trip myself. I personally believe If I worked for the money, it'll make the trip more satisfying and enjoyable, knowing I worked hard for the money.
4. My parents love my boyfriend, they know him well. I completely understand some of your statements on being too young to be in "Love". However, thats your own personal opinion. After he graduates he will be coming to Sydney, as he is doing an internship for a year before he goes off to university. I'm saying this because I'm sure most of you are thinking my boyfriend is driving my desire to go visit. I can honestly say, yes it is a little. I'm in love what can I say, but I have close friends there as well. So my trip is not purely based on my boyfriend. I know he is coming to see me either way, even if I can't go visit him.
5. As mentioned before, I lived there. I have close friends & family friends living there. Hotels and hostels are out of the picture. I will definitely be staying at a friends house. Potentially my boyfriends house, but not sure yet.
I apologise if I did not make things clear enough x
1. I lived in Basel with my family.
2. I have a very open relationship with my parents, which is very important to me. whilst I was in Basel, I was always out the house. The transportation in Europe is amazing, reliable and easy to use. Hence my parents were willing to let me go out into town, stay out late, and come and go as I please. Bottom line is, my parents were comfortable with me going out, they trusted me and knew where I went.
3. I have every intention to pay for this trip myself. I personally believe If I worked for the money, it'll make the trip more satisfying and enjoyable, knowing I worked hard for the money.
4. My parents love my boyfriend, they know him well. I completely understand some of your statements on being too young to be in "Love". However, thats your own personal opinion. After he graduates he will be coming to Sydney, as he is doing an internship for a year before he goes off to university. I'm saying this because I'm sure most of you are thinking my boyfriend is driving my desire to go visit. I can honestly say, yes it is a little. I'm in love what can I say, but I have close friends there as well. So my trip is not purely based on my boyfriend. I know he is coming to see me either way, even if I can't go visit him.
5. As mentioned before, I lived there. I have close friends & family friends living there. Hotels and hostels are out of the picture. I will definitely be staying at a friends house. Potentially my boyfriends house, but not sure yet.
Nov 22nd, 2014, 12:55 PM
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Lots of people your age "travel" on their own, taking planes or trains. The real problem may be hotels. Most hotels won't rent to people under age 18. If you have someone in Basel with whom you can stay, and if your parents give you the nihil obstat, I don't see a problem.
People used to get married at age 16 and younger, within my lifetime. I knew a girl of 16 who raised her two younger siblings when their parents were killed in a car accident. However, times change. It's not acceptable any more. You can't just continue to do things as they were done in Marie Antoinette's day, even if you don't coddle your kids. My oldest daughter used to take care of her little sister after school from the age of 11, walking her to piano lessons, taking her to choir practice. I would get arrested for that these days.
People used to get married at age 16 and younger, within my lifetime. I knew a girl of 16 who raised her two younger siblings when their parents were killed in a car accident. However, times change. It's not acceptable any more. You can't just continue to do things as they were done in Marie Antoinette's day, even if you don't coddle your kids. My oldest daughter used to take care of her little sister after school from the age of 11, walking her to piano lessons, taking her to choir practice. I would get arrested for that these days.
Nov 22nd, 2014, 01:16 PM
#17
If you're still living at home, depending on your parents for financial support, and they are still legally responsible for you, I don't think it matters what any of us think. Your parents are the ones who make the decision, and IMO it doesn't matter who's paying for the trip.
On the other hand, if you're living on your own, paying your own rent and financially supporting yourself in every way, then you can do whatever you wish and can afford.
These are just the facts of childhood v. adulthood. I have little doubt you would be fine traveling at 17 years of age. I did the same thing, but my parents approved.
On the other hand, if you're living on your own, paying your own rent and financially supporting yourself in every way, then you can do whatever you wish and can afford.
These are just the facts of childhood v. adulthood. I have little doubt you would be fine traveling at 17 years of age. I did the same thing, but my parents approved.
Nov 22nd, 2014, 02:47 PM
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#1 As a mother, I would feel uncomfortable having you travel to Europe on your own. My daughter did, and it was a big mistake.
#2 And MUCh more important, aren't you in school at that time of year ??? Graduating from high school isn't that big a deal. What, you'd travel all that way for an hour or two graduation ceremony and to spend a couple of days with the boy and your friends, and then fly back to Sydney and to school ? Madness.
You mentioned that you've now been back in Oz for four mos. I think this is a simple matter of being homesick for Basel. Buck up, kid, and try to be a little more mature, sensible.
#2 And MUCh more important, aren't you in school at that time of year ??? Graduating from high school isn't that big a deal. What, you'd travel all that way for an hour or two graduation ceremony and to spend a couple of days with the boy and your friends, and then fly back to Sydney and to school ? Madness.
You mentioned that you've now been back in Oz for four mos. I think this is a simple matter of being homesick for Basel. Buck up, kid, and try to be a little more mature, sensible.
Nov 22nd, 2014, 03:06 PM
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<i><font color=#555555>"I completely understand some of your statements on being too young to be in "Love"."</font></i>
I can only speak for myself. I'm far from "old," whatever that number is. It's important to be clear. Love at any age is wonderful. I would never discourage anyone, no matter what age, from experiencing it (within reason, of course).
<i><font color=#555555>"Hence my parents were willing to let me go out into town, stay out late, and come and go as I please."</font></i>
My parents gave me the same freedom at 17, as long as I didn't travel too far from them. I had a job. I paid for my own car. I was 18 when I took my first trip to NYC, to be in a commercial. My dad was not very supportive of my going alone, but my mom insisted I go. I went with a girlfriend, and my mother paid for her ticket. We had a blast, even though our hotel room was robbed. I moved to NYC, all by myself, barely a year later.
<i><font color=#555555>"I'm in love what can I say"</font></i>
What can anyone say, except good luck.
<i><font color=#555555>"You can't just continue to do things as they were done in Marie Antoinette's day"</font></i>
Where on earth did anyone recommend that on this thread?
I can only speak for myself. I'm far from "old," whatever that number is. It's important to be clear. Love at any age is wonderful. I would never discourage anyone, no matter what age, from experiencing it (within reason, of course).
<i><font color=#555555>"Hence my parents were willing to let me go out into town, stay out late, and come and go as I please."</font></i>
My parents gave me the same freedom at 17, as long as I didn't travel too far from them. I had a job. I paid for my own car. I was 18 when I took my first trip to NYC, to be in a commercial. My dad was not very supportive of my going alone, but my mom insisted I go. I went with a girlfriend, and my mother paid for her ticket. We had a blast, even though our hotel room was robbed. I moved to NYC, all by myself, barely a year later.
<i><font color=#555555>"I'm in love what can I say"</font></i>
What can anyone say, except good luck.
<i><font color=#555555>"You can't just continue to do things as they were done in Marie Antoinette's day"</font></i>
Where on earth did anyone recommend that on this thread?
Nov 22nd, 2014, 03:25 PM
#20
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One very important point has only been marginally discussed so far, and that is the legal situation. You are legally a minor. You will not be let into the country, probably not even on board the plane, without consent from both(!) parents in writing - even a notarized letter may be required. A lot has changed in that respect in the world in recent years, so the experiences from our own youth are of no use. Airlines and immigration officers have become sensitive to the brink of paranoia about runaway minors, children kidnapped by one parent and taken out of the country, and such.
All this has nothing to do with your personality, experience and maturity. You sound like someone well capable of such a trip. But staff at the airports do not know you. They know the laws. As long as you're not 18 yet, you'll have to deal with legal requirements. Ask the Swiss embassy and the airline you intend to use what kind of documentation they require, and meet the strictest version of these requirements.
All this has nothing to do with your personality, experience and maturity. You sound like someone well capable of such a trip. But staff at the airports do not know you. They know the laws. As long as you're not 18 yet, you'll have to deal with legal requirements. Ask the Swiss embassy and the airline you intend to use what kind of documentation they require, and meet the strictest version of these requirements.
