You're alrady hosting someone in your home - don;t see why you should have a goody bag as well. Seems she should be bringing you the gift.

Also, without knowing the person - who knows what she may want/need? I would wait until she arrives - they see waht she's interested in. (And I'm not sure what meaningful small american toeksn are.)

nytraveler, it would be considered a small gesture of hospitality. It isn't about what she needs or wants.

Not knowing the circumstances of your role or your relationship (or not) with this person, it's hard to know what would be appropriate. A business connection is very different from a student on homestay, for example, and a person you've been in communication with over time is very different from a complete stranger.

In theory, though, I don't see anything wrong in giving the person a souvenir-like memento of her visit.

Jean, thank you for your reply. She is coming as part of a group of woman who have or teach special needs children.
They are coming to learn about programs and tour facilities. She is 27 and I want to make this very special for her.

What are you trying to do here?

And how do you know "it would be considered a small gesture of hospitality"? Are you a mind-reader?

You're making - presumably - a significant gesture of hospitality by hosting this Russian. Unless you're charging them (in which case, any goodie offered by any other hotel or B&B, like a welcome glass of champagne of sherry, or a box of local chocolates, is fine) anything else is unnecessary - and will convey a message you might not intend.

If you're trying to subsidise them, use of your fuel credit card, or a pass to your local metro, will probably work.

Otherwise:
If you're trying to orientate them: well, you may look as if you think they're incapable of having downloaded the local subway map for themselves.
If you think they'll be homesick without blinis or kasha or proper vodka: how do you know that?
If you want to propagandise your way of life: realise that's what you're doing, and few people appreciate being preached at.
If you want to give them a souvenir: wait till they're about to go and give them the photographs, or the copy of the NY Times Sunday edition or whatever it might be that crystallises their stay. Souvenirs are about remembrance. You've no idea what makes an appropriate souvenir till you know what they're likely to be remembering.

Guests offer their hosts tokens of appreciation. Hosts say thank you. Anything else is otiose, and can easily be misinterpreted.

If my previous post sounded negative, here's a little story.

Half a century ago, my family hosted the first foreigner ever to cross the threshold any flanner had ever met outside wartime: a French schoolboy, roughly my own age, with whom I was swapping, a month at a time.

Unsure of what to do about his food, my mother rushed to the nearest posh food shop and asked them what the French ate. The deli manager - who'd never been more than 50 miles outside Liverpool- waved a "French stick " (English bread, shaped like a baguette) and mum bought it.

On Jacques' first evening with us, she proudly brought out the French stick, sliced and slavered in butter. Jacques politely ate it, and the following day off he & I went to our first group tour round the city with the other French exchange students.

"So what did YOU think of les angliches' food?" said Marie-Therese to Jacques. "Yes, what was yours like" chipped in Yves. And Jean-Pierre. And Francoise.

'Deguelasse', they all agreed - forgetting our French was a great deal better than their English (We'd all been taught by Jesuits. They were victims of France's state-run system for turning out world-class underperformers). 'That bread. Not a bloody idea' they all said.

And the deli didn't sell another French stick for the whole of those French teenagers' stay.

My old American friend brought his new Russian bride to our home from Siberia for her first visit to the States. She was watching me make sandwiches for lunch, and pointed to the head of lettuce I had taken from the frig and asked, "What is that, and what do you use it for?"

I was stunned. She had never seen lettuce before. Now that was over ten years ago, and I'm sure the Russian exposure to foods from around the world has broadened considerably, but do not expect the things you choose as gifts, or serve for dinner, to be immediately familiar to her.

I'd suggest things that will make her visit easier. Is she going to be traveling by public transportation? If so, whether or not she's able to download a bus/subway map, I'm sure she won't be offended if you give her one along with a packet of subway tokens/bus tickets? How about some magazines in her room? A photobook of your city she can take home? Some snacks for her room (a package of sweets, trailmix, nuts, etc.). She might feel shy about going into the kitchen and helping herself if she feels like a snack. A local newspaper might be nice too.

Goddesstogo, thanks a million. Home made chocolate chip cookies for the sweets, some bottled water added and I am good to go.

Nukesafe, that is funny. I'm alway intrigued when something like that happens.

Hello, auhntiei, from my experiences a small but lovely bouquet of flowers in her bedroom would be a sweet "welcome" for her stay with you. And some goodies, home made chocolate chip cookies seems to be loved by everyone. And perhaps a few small bottles of water in her room, replenish as needed. Another thought, a map of your city and perhaps even a map of your state. I have found that often visitors really don't understand exactly where they are. They can take the maps home to show others where they have been. A few magazines is a good idea, perhaps a fashion one for fun and a home decor magazine. Do you have a TV you can put in her bedroom? If so I have found that is always a treat for European guest as they can watch whatever they want after they go to their room for the night. If the TV isn't possible, don't give it another thought. Anyway, just a few thoughts. I am sure your guest will feel welcomed and have a wonderful stay with you, it should be a fun week for all.

Russian sweets(cakes candy chocolate) are really really good, she is liable to not be impressed unless the cookies are great. Foodwise, go with an exotic fruit basket. Productwise, go with name brands; Memorabiliawise, check who is selling albums well in Russia.

auhntiei, do you know if this woman is the mother of a special needs child or a teacher? If she's the mother, you could give her a telephone calling card so that she could phone home during her stay. I also like the ideas of maps, public trans info and tokens or tickets and a TV or radio in the bedroom. After a day of dealing with differences in language, culture, food, etc., and absorbing information, your guest will likely need some down time alone.

As a counterpoint to flanneruk's story, my parents opened our home to many young people over 25 years or so. Most were homestay students from Japan, but there were boy scouts from Finland, foreign teachers/tutors of English attending workshops, friends of friends, etc. Some were duds and expected to be chauffeured around L.A. Some were too shy to get to know, but some have remained friends for more than 40 years and have hosted us in their homes.

If you want to have a pretty bouquet in her room that's fine - something you would do for any guest. The same for some crackers etc. But I don;t consider either of those a gift (you use them or they die) or a meaningful small token of America.

The way the OP was written sounded as if you were going to introduce someone from a primitive society to things they had never seen before (not true of anyone from a major city in Russia - some things may be expensive - but anything is available).

The first time that we stayed with our former French neighbors at their home in France they presented us with a basket (from Habitat) of regional bath products--and a box of local chocolates. That started our stay off very nicely.

I think a goody bag of 'tchotchkes' is totally unnecessary and very likely unwanted.

A telephone calling card? Most every Russian visitor I've met has had a cell phone that works for calls back home

But things to brighten up her bedroom/bath - that would be great. I wouldn't consider those 'gifts' though - that's just being hospitable. Flowers, maybe a small dish of shortbread or piroulines or some such cookies. Those sorts of things.

I'm not sure that a Russian teacher would want to pay international roaming rates on her cellphone to phone back home. I think a calling card sounds very considerate, and she could get a lot of minutes for $5.

If it were me, I'd of course be very happy to have a pleasant hostess and a nice room, but a "gift bag" sounds like a fun touch. I really don't get the responses which seem so negative to this idea. Even getting flashlights and pens and other small gifts at conferences is fun.

She may not think to bring a camera. What about a disposable camera? You could have the film developed after she leaves and then send her the pictures. If she does bring her own camera, so what -- then you've just got a disposable to use for yourself. It's not a big investment.

OK maybe your experience w/ visitors from Russia is different than mine. They either 1) already own a fine camera - or 2) plan on buying one in the States because of the better prices/selection and the exchange rate.

I guess some of us have different ideas of hospitality.

If this is the mother of a special needs child, this trip may be difficult on many levels. I think we can assume she doesn't have money for a hotel and may also not have money for cell service with international roaming. It's possible she's never been out of Russia.

Even if this is not the mother but is a teacher of special needs children, I think we can still assume she doesn't have a lot of money or would likely be staying in a hotel.

It's entirely possible she owns a camera, janis. That's why I said she may not think to bring it. I own a pretty good camera but I often either choose not to take it on trips or (more often than not) I forget it. If she's going to buy a camera in the US, so what? So her host has spent a couple of bucks on a disposable that won't get used. She's only coming for a week and it sounds like much of her time is planned. Maybe she won't have time for serious camera shopping.

Like WillTravel, I don't understand the negative responses here. No one is saying she's a little country mouse who doesn't understand big city ways (or own a camera). Her host is just trying to be thoughtful and plan a few little treats for her. I guess there shouldn't be flowers in her bedroom because they have flowers in Russia.

janisj, your experiences are probably with tourists. This woman is not coming here for a vacation.

I vote for a box of local chocolates.

You are the host, you've already offered a gesture of kindness by allowing this person to stay in your home.

The visitor should be bringing you a gift.

Not trying to implying anything, but just because the guest is from Russia doesn't mean she needs/wants things from America.

Don't over-do it; what may be seen as friendliness/kindness to Americans may not be seen that way by other cultures. Just my two cents.

I would imagine a special ed teacher in Russia does not draw a fantastic salary any more than the special ed teacher's in the US do, and from what I understand about salaries in Russia no doubt she is paid very poorly. I have family members via marriage that are from Russia and they are no different than we are in the US basically. Kindness and some treats given with thoughtfulness is always appreciated.

What the person has been exposed to really depends on where in Russia they are from. Although many big cities in Russia have Ikea now and are exposed to many Western products (although we very few American products here). And we don't have head lettuce here, only leaf lettuce, thankfully (I hate head lettuce).

One thing that is unusual is any kind of peanut butter candy since we don't have that here. Some Russian really like peanut butter, others do not, since they are not used to it. Other than that, there is not too much that is unique about America that I can think of sharing. Everything is MUCH cheaper in America, so she'll probably want to do some shopping.

An American living in Moscow

Anything you would think of to make an American feel at home and comfortable: chocolates, water, a few magazines, warm socks, fresh flowers, small toiletries. Remember that if she wants Russian things she has those at home, and if she needs something special you can take her shopping. The fun of visiting another country and staying in our homes is experiencing OUR culture. Enjoy her stay and the diversity of cultures.

I attended a function in Pittsburgh recently and the hostess supplied all the out of town guests with gift bags containing small tokens of the city. A couple little souvenir type things, maybe pencils and paper with the name of the city or a local team, some local candies, maps and information about sights to visit. It was a nice touch.

The way the OP was written sounded as if you were going to introduce someone from a primitive society to things they had never seen before (not true of anyone from a major city in Russia - some things may be expensive - but anything is available).

I must say that I was worried about worried too.
I remembering shuddering when somebody gave a goody bag for a French student with a lady's shaver and deodorant.
A nice bunch of flowers is quite enough.

I have no idea how you (or others) got that idea from how the OP was written. I assumed it was souvenir items.

I guess I'm not as easily offended as some of you. If I were a guest in someone's home in Russia and they put together a basket of stuff for me, I'd think they were being generous and thoughtful, even if the stuff wasn't quite on the mark. (If they put a lady's shaver and deodorant in the basket, I'd think oh good! and I'd put it in my suitcase to take home.)

Just a cute, applicable story: When we moved to the US (New Jersey, from Toronto) while my SO did his graduate work, we got a letter from a local family who had obviously signed up with Princeton to be mentors and friends to foreign students. They offered to help us (as foreign students, which we actually were) find our way around, learn American customs, etc. We thought it was funny but sweet and kind. We called (or maybe wrote, I don't remember) to thank them and say that there were probably students from farther away who needed this more than we did. But we certainly weren't offended.

once again we see that flanny has some very bizarre thoughts on gift giving. any american trying to give a gift to a non-american just can't get it right no matter what.

flanny's twisted rules for giving gifts to foreigners:

1. if you give them something you are implying that they cannot get it in their home country. even if they really can't get it in their home country, you are implying that they are a provincial who doesn't travel out of their home country. presumably with an attitude that only americans travel and the rest of the world is too poor to travel(thereby displaying typical american arrogance and ignorance).

2. if you give them something american you are implying that american things are better than other peoples' things. this is ironic because other peoples' things are better than american things. americans should not give american things because it's more american arrogance and ignorance.

3. if you give a gift of art or literature, you are implying that other people are more stupid than americans. this is arrogant and also ironic because americans are more stupid.

4. (my personal favourite) don't give, for example, a frenchman something american that is not available in france, because the french don't like anything that is not available in france.

flanner's thoughts on this are based on a single incident half a century ago and from a child's point of view -- obviously an incident that made a lifelong impression on him (although maybe it's time to let that one go, flanner). Hard to give that any credence, though, when it comes to the OP's question.

This whole thread should be filed under 'no good deed goes unpunished'.

I doubt a 27 year old Russian female guest would be interested in cookies/chocolate (she might think the Russian ones are better than the US since chocolate tastes different in different countries) since they mostly are concerned with their figures and watch what they eat and what they wear. Alot are not very adventurous and not that interested in trying new things eg peanut butter candies. Even flowers can be tricky because flowers given in even numbers are "for the dead".

Unfortunately what we think would be very nice to receive (even if a little off the mark) is not what the average Russian might think since they think very differently to us.

Might be best to decide once the guest is in the home and make a judgment then on what souvenirs to give them to take home.

I am so appreciative to each of you that offered such kind and thoughtful comments and suggestions. Sadly it is appalling to reach such negative comments made by fellow Fodorites. It is clear whose host or hostess would go the extra mile in an effort to make a foreign guest feel special.

I dont think anyone here would be a poor host, just different ideas what suitable gifts are. I remember as kids we took some exchange students to Tower records where they LOVED it and spent all their money there. Hence we were in big trouble from the host family for taking them there. The guestd loved us, but the families didnt.

A more recent example is: We had a E European client that we wanted dearly to impress. After a week of special care the best event of the trip was going to Home Depot and fixing some plumbing at our office.

I guess all you can do is be yourself

I think Nikki had the best idea, if this is just to give them souvenirs of their trip, it should be just a few random souvenir-type things. Other things are truly weird in my opinion, to be giving them to guests when you are the hostess (eg, the suggestion to give them a pair of warm socks????)

FrankS, your post reminded me of my cousin's visit last year. He lives on a boat in Europe. We took him to Costco and Home Depot, and he went nuts.

Oh, I didn't see this thread before. Stop thinking from American point of view! The best gift for her would be something that she can show off, either display or wear when she gets back.

Nothing edible - it won't last. Besides, russian chocolate is euroean chocolate, no offense, but US chocolate cannot compete. Odin covered the flowers, totally agree

As all you know is her gender and age... I would go with inexpensive jewelry. Or/and local souvenirs. Cosmetics, perhaps.

As for camera... if a film camera - will she have money to develop the film? if a digital camera - does she even own a computer?

"As for camera... if a film camera - will she have money to develop the film?"

Dayenu,
that's why I suggested a disposable -- it's not much of a waste if she brings her own camera and her hosts can develop the film for her after she leaves and send her the pics as a souvenir of her visit.

Can I also suggest that you include something she can take home to her son once you find out a bit about him (age, skills, likes and dislikes, etc.)

oh. I just skimmed back over the posts -- I don't know why I thought she had a son. Maybe she just works with the kids. In any case, if she has a child of her own, my suggestion still stands.

For goodness sake.
If I were entertaining a professional woman from the US, I wouldn't give her a goody bag with cheap jewellery and a cheap camera.
I'd leave a nice bunch of flowers in her room and possibly a London A to Z.
This Russian teacher will surely bring her own digital camera.
It's more likely that she will be the one bringing gifts to you.
Take her around, show her the sights and give her a good time.

i wouldn't give her a film camera. she'll most definitely be bringing a minox spy camera so she's already got the camera thing sorted.

She may not be a professional woman. As I understand it, some of these women work with special needs kids and some are their mothers. I wouldn't assume that either is well-off financially.

If you know her profession (a teacher or healthcare professional for example), she'd probably enjoy some of the "trade" magazines for her profession. If you can't get hold of them easily, simply ask someone who's in the same profession. For example, if the Russian visitor is a nurse, there are tons of magazines for nurses. Msot of them are circulated only in their "home" country--an American newsmagazine for nurses is highly unlikely to be available in Russia (even if there's a web site, the online content may be limited or restricted to subscribers). I've found that nearly everybody enjoys reading about others who have the same jobs they do--industry gossip, controversies, employment market etc.

And I defy anyone to find something condescending or pretentious or worrisome in such a gift.

Ditto if she's a librarian, or works in marketing or car sales or grocery stores or even in a funeral home. I don't think there's a job left in this world that doesn't have a magazine or newsletter about it.

"And I defy anyone to find something condescending or pretentious or worrisome in such a gift."

Give it a minute, passerine. (I think it's a great idea.)

There's not one thing I can think of that my host could give me, if it's a gift from the heart, that would offend me. I'm assuming this visitor will be as gracious a guest as auhntiei is a host and will not fly into a snit if the little gifts don't match her economic stature.

Jean, when I was 21 I actually considered living on a boat, boy I am glad I didnt do that( 30 ft bayliner). Anyways this man just loved Home Depot, I think the hour he spent their was the best hr in his trip.

Dayenu, hopefully she will bring some of those chocolates with her(not to mention some caviar and stoli)

"Give it a minute, passerine." - didn't even take a minute

"If you know her profession (a teacher or healthcare professional for example), she'd probably enjoy some of the "trade" magazines for her profession." - IN WHAT LANGUAGE??

Do you seriously think any of her co-workers will understand enough English to read that magazine? Most likely will be left behind as too heavy.

"janisj, your experiences are probably with tourists."

Nope - I have a close relative who lives in Russia. And I live in an area w/ lots of Russian and Ukrainian families who have visitors from their homelands.

"This woman is not coming here for a vacation." That is obvious from the OP . . . .

Also - many Russian visitors come intending to stock up on things that are cheaper than back home. Most airlines have really cut back on the luggage allowances and overweight charges are a serious problem. So I personally wouldn't give her anything substantial that she needs to carry back.

That is why I agreed w/ those suggesting to provide comforts/niceties in her bedroom/bath. I also really like Passerine's idea of professional magazines/journals.

Frank, russian candy are always a great hit with americans at our house! Living in San Francisco, it's easy to get them

Not so with caviar - red is affordable for us. I remember first time our sons' girlfriends came, sure I put caviar on the table - turned myself inside out to please them They looked, what is it? fish poop? After they left, my tummy had a holiday

Dayenu,
Do you think this group of Russian women would have specifically planned a trip to the US to study US programs and facilities if somebody didn't speak English?

I give up!

I'm leaving with you, goddesstogo.

GTG, I am thinking of her going home, not what she's doing here. Isn't the main purpose of her trip to bring something home - teaching ideas, new clothes, photos ?

Yes, she will have a nice SHORT trip, but then she'll go back home to her town to show her students and co-workers... cookies? magazines they cannot read?

You're assuming no Russians can read English. That's certainly not true of the Russians I know (and believe me, we have a huge Russian community here, most of them immigrants who moved here within the past 10 years and all of whom speak English very well).

It's just so ridiculous that every suggestion that has been made has been undermined for one reason or another. This isn't exactly rocket science, you know -- it's a little welcoming gift for a houseguest. You guys must be very picky and annoying guests, always looking to find fault in things your hosts are trying to do for you. I hope the OP's guest is more gracious.

Anyone receiving a goody bag from a host and NOT being APPRECIATIVE of the thought.. would not be very high on my list.

I can't imagine an educated person would "read into" anything unusual or offensive about a gift.

I, too, am pretty surprised at some of the answers to such a simple, direct question.

Enjoy her stay. It seems she should certainly feel well taken care of at your place.

Perhaps she will bring you a packet of blini mix