Coquelicot

What are the differences in using these terms of apology or regret?

When approaching a stranger for directions: ______________, madame, pouvez-vous nous aider?

When apologizing for something minor, like bumping someone accidentally.

As in regretting that you cannot do something (like speak French well!).

Any clarifications will be appreciated.
Thank you!

mikelg

When approaching a stranger: excusez moi...

When apologizing (bumping), pardon

When regretting, je suis desolé, mais je ne parle pas Français, madame (or monsieur).

rex

If you leave off "monsieur" or "madame"...

i.e., "excusez-moi, monsieur"

or "pardon, madame" or "pardonnez-moi, mademoiselle"...

...then the "etiquette" of choosing the right word/verb will be the lesser of the two problems!

Best wishes,

Rex

PalenQ

well the french, of course, have no such words to express such sentiments, due to cultural traits

Christina

I think what Mike says is pretty good, although there are many different ways to say the last one (as well as the first), and I wouldn't necessarily use desole in that case. It would be okay, though, and since you don't speak French, no point in getting too elaborate. Don't believe Rex (or what he is implying, I believe, although I don't really understand what he's trying to say), lots of French people say simply "pardon" when bumping people, and leave off honorifics. Most French people aren't as fanatical and rigid about some of these things as some Americans think. Several French people bumped into me in crowded stores in Paris a few weeks ago, and none of them said anything other than "pardon".

kerouac

To get through a crowd, you say "pardon." If you step on somebody's foot or knock an old lady down, you say "excusez-moi."

kerouac

To reply to the first question, actually 'pardon' and 'excusez-moi' are interchangeable in that sentence.

PalenQ

so i sound weird when i say, to get thru a crowd 'scuse-ez' ( i also say pardon)

but would you ever say 'scuse-ez (en lieu de excusez-moi or 'scuse-ez-moi - or do i sound just silly when i say scuse-ez even if i step on someone?

thanks for making apparent to me the difference between pardon and excusez-moi

tomassocroccante

Would any of you say, "S'il vous plait, madame ... " when about to ask a question?

StCirq

If I'm asking a question of a stranger, yes, I would always begin with S'il vous plaît, Madame.... or Excusez-moi, Monsieur, j'ai une question....or Madame, s'il vous plaît......

It's not exactly formulaic....

PalenQ

so again i'm wrong when i say 'pardon, madame'

it has to be excusez? never pardon ou pardonnez-moi when stopping someone to ask a question?

StCirq

I don't think saying "pardon, Madame..." when you're stopping to ask someone a question sounds exactly right to my ear, but I don't think there's anything flat-out wrong about it....kind of depends on what you follow it with. If you said, for example, "Pardon, Madame, mais j'ai une question, s'il vous plaît...." that would not necessarily be weird, I don't think.

PalenQ

thanks. in any case the message is is to be as polite as possible - always works wonders to say the proper pleasantry in local language instead of just barking Do You Know Where the Louvre Is?

(a great true story - i was in the Louvre courtyard two years ago before opening and a guy came up to me in hysterics barking at me "Mona Lisa, Mona Lisa" - and i answered him in American about he was at the Louvre already but it wasn't open. He obviously thought i was French because he said so - but what a way to ask a question.

He calmed down and actually was quite nice. But he could have used some Fodor advice about tact.

tomassocroccante

Merci.

annhig

hi, coquelicot,

no need to get so hung up about this, IMO.

they will know you're not french anyway, so the important thing is getting your meaning across, not your grammatical construction.

throwing in "Madame/Monsieu" a lot gives breathing/thinking space.

sounding too good has a down side - [not necessarily from personal experience]-they rattle away in french thinking you know what they mean!

regards, ann

nytraveler

In general europeans are much more formal with strangers than americans. And although it sounds odd - and perhaps even pretentious - to us to add all this "S'il vous plait, madam or monsieur" to a simple quesions for directions or something - in europe this is the expected way.

(Many of them - esp past student age - generally consider us as much too informal - in terms of things like this, using first names as soon as you meet someone etc..)

Bloom

Off topic a bit but I love the French response to when you thank them:

"Je vous en prie."

IMO, it's a more gracious expression than the "Bienvenue", or "De rien" that we use in Canada.

I also like your username, Coquelicot- french for poppy. And I like the word for dragonfly, too- libellule. French is such a lovely language.

Bloom