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Caribbean family vacation

Hello,
I need some help with this one. I'd like to book a trip to the caribbean for my family of 6 (myself, wife, 4 kids, 12,9,4,2).
We've been to:
punta cana( beautiful but probably my least favorite destination...nothing to do off resort)
Playa del Carmen (everyone loved it!!!! Nice beaches, lots to do off resort.
St thomas/ St. John( loved it but don't think it would be good for little ones ....too much car/ferry time...everything too spread out.)
What we're looking for ideally:
1. 10 days
2. Nice beach(given)
3. Rental( we love our kids but 10 days in the same room won't work hahaha so I guess resorts are out) a villa with a pool would be best that way when kids want to go to pool, we can cook while keeping an eye on them.
4. Somewhere safe
5. Car rental ( love exploring)
6. Things family/kids/adults can do besides beach(we'll obviously do the beach but other activities would be good).
Restaurants not a big deal...mostly cooking in.
I was thinking aruba or grand cayman might fit that bill but it seems aruba has mostly high rise rentals and grand cayman might be a little boring for kids.
Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated on any islands you think might work...no resort for us is a big deal...villa only!!
Budget: 20k total(plane tix, villa, car, food, activities etc...)
We'd like to fly direct from boston or minimal (1) layover. Little ones hate long flights!!!! Hahaha
Thank you , I look forward to your advice

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