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New Zealand itinerary advice please

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My husband, 2.5 year old and I are travelling to New Zealand Jan 17 from Northern Ireland. We are flying into Auckland (21st jan) and out of Christchurch (20th feb) and are attending a wedding in Cardrona on 4th February. I have a motorhome booked 1st -17th February.
I've drafted out an itinerary so I can think about getting car, accommodation, campsites etc booked. It can be changed and feel free to suggest places/things to do or if we've planned wrong.
We arrive on the 21st Jan. Going to stay 21st and 22nd in auckland then hire car (do u think we need longer?)
23rd - Akl to Waitomo caves, stay in Hamilton
24th - Hobbiton set to Rotorua
25th - Explore
26th - Rotorua - Taupo - Napier
27th - explore
28th - Napier - ?
29th - ? - Wellington
30th - Explore
31st - Wellington - fly to Christchurch
1st - collect camper then Aoraki/Mt Cook
2nd - Explore
3rd - ?
4th - Wedding in Cardrona
5th - Te Anau
6th - Explore poss milford sound
7th - Queenstown
8th - Explore
9th - Wanaka
10th - Explore
11th - Haast pass to Franz Joseph
12th - Explore
13th - Punakaiki
14th - Nelson
15th - Explore
16th - Lewis pass to Hanmer springs
17th - Christchurch (camper return)
18th - Explore
19th - Explore
20th - flight home 16:55
Have we too many nights in Christchurch? An extra night in Queenstown needed? I can add an extra day to the campervan.
I have spoken to our friends in N.Z. and they suggest an extra night in Auckland and travelling down the Coromandel Peninsula (Whangamata & Matamata) but I don't appear to be able to get it put together in a sensible itinerary. They recommended dropping Waitomo caves as it's out of the way and not much in Hamilton. I hope this isn't stupid I'm just trying to make the most of our once in a lifetime trip.
Apologies for the long essay

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