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urgent help with planning a suitable itinerary for the Far East - 20 days

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Please help with planning a suitable itinerary for the Far East.
(20 days in all)
We are a family - mum,dad, daughter(18 years old),daughter(6 years old)
We arrive in Bangkok on the 16th December and depart Kuala Lumpur on the 5th January.
Wish list:
Thailand: Bangkok, Chang Mai, Pattaya and Phuket
Malaysia: Penang,Kuala Lumpur
Have not organised hotels or tours and desperately need suggestions and the most cost effective routing for air travel between Thailand, Singapore and Malaysia.
I am hoping for advice from the regular Fodorites.
thanks in anticipation

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